when I commit to a session with someone, I feel the physiological download as soon as we set the appointment — and sometimes prior! what this looks like for me is an eclipse of the person’s feelings, patterns, thoughts, physical sensations and so on — typically in the form of whatever is blocking or plaguing them, past present and future. I do not just “tune in” during the session, but rather I am made like a very sensitive sonar — picking up signals and symptoms all day, every day. there is no “protection” from this, it is just the way that I am made. as a child, it was awful. as a young person dating, it was awful. I constantly confused what was mine with what belonged to somebody else. now, it is a tool that I have managed and work hard at managing on a moment to moment basis! this tool is also a fantastic gift to share with others who share my sensitive nuances (and though I am clearly an exaggerated version, we ALL do share this antenna, by the way — we are just programmed not to realize it).
here is just one example to illustrate what happens on my end when I work with people: one month I received a phone call from a person. I recall ringing them back relatively soon (I am normally backed up one or two months with old calls to return), which was based solely on blind intuition. for this purpose, I prefer to know logically nothing about a person before I see them. logic is a snap for me — and due to such, I treat many Ivy League medical professionals who actually specify in psychology or psychoanalytics; it is the intuitive feelings and perceptions that hold the gold, and so I preserve it as best as possible. anyhow, I spoke on the phone with this person and they told me that they were ready for a session, but they just weren’t sure what they would speak about. I said to just wait until it felt right. a day later, this person rang me and we played phone tag for two days. on the third day, I left this person a voicemail and I woke up with CRUSHING pain. I am leaving very personal and graphic details out of this entry to preserve privacy. this crushing pain began first thing in the morning, lasted all day, and continued through one of my afternoon meetings (with a former patient! – major side note, we are working together on a brilliant project – blog and update to come…). since I had taken the prior 5 days off from any sessions, and mostly cocooned (sleeping my regular 10 hours per night, eating high vibration foods, hydrating, detoxing at hot yoga, barely speaking with anyone) I was perplexed as to my physical and also emotional or spiritual condition — it was difficult to articulate what I was feeling. I rode out the day, assuming I was having some kind of ascension symptom or personal release as it related to my area of crushing pain. the next day, the person called me back and we scheduled for the very next day – 24 hours after the final phone call, and just 48 hours after my crushing pain. although my pain subsided, I recalled having tinges of it during our very first phone conversation a couple of weeks back (at which point I mentioned such on the call). as I sat in the session and began looking into my patient, I was flooded with SO much information that I did not know where to start or how to sort through it (which is why it generally takes 4 hours of discussion before I can physically work on someone – energy does not move until we agree to it, both consciously and subconsciously, at least in MY opinion and experience). a couple of hours in, I found out the reason that this person called me back a final time after our initial phone tag and their wondering “what they would talk to me about”, despite being very pulled to see me: the morning of my crushing pain, this person received horrific, category 5 tragic news. the reality of this news could not be more directly tied to my crushing pain as it also physically existed in the same exact part of my patient’s body. hence, I had already began experiencing this session in the midst of us trying to book it, before we had even scheduled. clearly this was spirit organizing our important (and VERY timely) meeting. not only did this involve myself and my patient, but also a third party (if we are being specific to the nature of the tragedy — many more souls were connected to this event). I had to sort through all of the info I was receiving during the session for everything to make sense. rarely do I feel so personally moved and compelled as I did during this session, because the awe of the event was just so unbelievable. after the session, I was similarly tied, of course, like I am with any session. I could feel not only the physical aftereffects, but the emotional sadness connected to the entire situation and session. I had to remind myself, as usual, that I was feeling something that was not mine. so that I could observe it, accept it and let it pass like a storm. this happens for EVERY session, by the way. I am simply a channel or vessel to interpret information, take it through me as if I am the dishwasher, and transmute it for the person when they have done all they can themselves and can not seem to move it – whatever “it” is.
after a session, I can feel the tremors of a person’s process like an earthquake. this is one of the reasons that I use remote sessions to accompany someone’s in person session — it helps to shake off the crumbs, and it allows the person to delve deeper into their process so that things don’t remain stuck. sometimes I feel the aftereffects for weeks. and when I work with multiple people in one week, it can be very overwhelming. it is not just the 5 or so hours in person that I connect to. I spend ample time releasing energy for both my patient and for myself. in some cases this takes many days and then lingers. it is difficult having so many people whom I have worked with attached to my ethereal field — so I am extra careful about who I work with and when. when the timing is right, a person will not only be able to handle the intensity of the session, but they will also be able to “support” the aftereffects of such by doing their OWN work that I suggest. this always moves things along much faster! for everyone 🙂
how do I know when I have actively transmuted a session and fully assisted the person? it is different each time as far as timing and particulars go. however, when I feel like I have finally been able to get an uninterrupted night’s sleep and my mind is high and positive (as it is when I am not in frequent contact with anybody!), then I know we are on the upswing.
I can not stress enough, how important it is as an empath, to not claim others’ feelings as your own. this is where codependency shows up in all kinds of relationships. if you are an empath to the degree that I experience, personal space is CRUCIAL. because you will indeed become the experiences of every single person you interact with until you understand how to manage the process. (another blog on that). in my personal experience in relationships of all kinds, I have found that without proper boundaries, people will mistake my own power and gifts for theirs; suddenly they are riding my coattails and have no idea they are doing so — because I allowed my field to merge with theirs. when one frequency is dominant or higher, it is actually the one “at risk”; energy flows from top to bottom, and therefore it will absorb the lower densities of any energy it communicates with via phone, email, in person, etc. when we know our OWN natural energy levels and suddenly they are completely thrown off, it is more than safe to say that someone has (wittingly or unwittingly) completed invaded our sacred space. if we do not catch this, we can end up in a seesaw position where all of our gold and magic (and health!) plummets — whilst the other person uses it, confusing it with their own. for this reason, again, I am careful about who I take on as a patient, a friend or an acquaintance. people MUST be able to do their own “work”, or things will get convoluted. one day I will blog about the awful romantic relationships I had in my 20s when I didn’t understand what was happening!
in conclusion, committing to a session with somebody is a massive undertaking for me. I must not only be energetically wise about doing so, but if I notice ANY of my boundaries are violated (unintentionally, of course, and not necessarily even on the 3D plane!, but beyond — entities, both positive and negative, are rampant and active with all persons), then I must step back and wait for the right time to pursue the session or connection. being a marionette to assist another person is fascinating and a true, true pleasure — as long as everything is “right”, and that involves my full-time job to remain as a clean and clear vessel. I monitor my interactions, my food (dead meat is death and suffering and I feel it intensely), my exercise, and what is mine on a strictly personal and physiological level.