fact: people will try to bait you and/or flip out on you when they want something they can not get from you – because what they want is actually INTANGIBLE
I’ve seen this quite a bit in my life. many of the people I see in my practice have seen this quite a bit in their lives, too. it is a simple fact that all humans are created equal and all energy is NOT. therefore, when you have one person whose fruits of their spiritual labor and energy is thriving or maximizing, there will be another person who has not even approached the fruits of their spiritual labor and their energy is reliant (because they consciously or subconsciously believe it to be) upon the fields of OTHERS. however, the reliant person may be so stuck in ego, having confused “knowledge” with EXPERIENCE, that they will actually NEED a food supply since they are not actually creating it from within. they have not lived long enough, or they have not passed certain tests administered or to be administered by their own divine path, or something else. here is how to spot a person in this position and understand their behavior.
JACKIE! one of my best girls. I am honored to now call her a perfect friend. check out her awesome new wellness center *Floating Lotus* (yes, salt water sensory deprivation float tanks!) near Columbus Circle: http://floatinglotus.com/
don’t judge your journey: whether you came from a loving home/past, or an abusive home/past, it is ALL relative
I have worked with people who say to me (with some embarrassment and self-judgement) that the very worst thing they have ever been through in life is not getting into their college of choice, and that it truly “ruined their life”. we are often quick to judge others who have not “had it bad enough” or whom we would judge as not being able to relate to our “difficult” circumstances in life. well, it is ALL relative. I have had to let these folks know, the ones who say something like the opening sentence in this paragraph, that their feelings are INDEED valid. and, it goes deeper than that…if the only thing we ever know is support, loving kindness and ease in life at the good graces of our families or those around us, then what happens when those people go away/physically die or are not there to “remind” us of our value? deep panic and darkness can ensue when we have not had to learn how to remind OUR SELF of that value.
I used to look at seemingly carefree, stress-free, and “happy” women on the train and think “man, what would it be like to be that woman? what would my life look like without experiencing so much trauma and abuse and struggle and judgement and sadness? I WISH I could have a taste of that life”. I also judged my own process because part of me blamed myself for my past, which was like a dirty secret that I hid from those I deemed “healthy”, and over-shared with those who I felt were equally broken at some point. I also felt incredible GUILT each and every time I saw a homeless person, or someone who I felt I had “more” than. the guilt often felt crippling, and it contributed to some of the settling I did in my life during that time. what I didn’t understand at the time was the RELATIVE nature of life’s experiences. perhaps I did NOT actually want that carefree, stress-free and happy woman on the train’s life (the present-day irony is that I now look like that carefree, stress-free and happy woman on the train). did my friends who had very stable, supportive and loving families and experiences make me feel good to be around? yes and no. yes because the vibration of love, stability and strength felt aligned with my core. no because the vibration of love, stability and strength felt so opposed to my experience, and thus scary (literally scary – I can remember eating a holiday dinner at my boyfriend’s house and having to leave the table to go cry in the bathroom because I didn’t feel “worthy” of the normalcy and love that I was experiencing at the table. my ego was in freak-out mode). however, I also noticed that when something “went wrong” in the life of one of these people I aspired to be like or feel like, that even with all of the “proper” support in the world, the internal world of the person I would have described as having an “easier” time in life became no different than what my internal world felt like on a fairly frequent basis. in fact, given the CONTRAST between their past experience and their then-current relative struggle, they might have been touching upon a very deep and sudden pain.
people (friends and patients) have said to me things like, “I feel like my journey doesn’t really count, or my transformation can’t be that big, because I haven’t had it as hard as you. your journey has been so much more difficult than mine, therefore how can things really change for me?”. that is totally bogus, and it is also self-judgement. who is to say that my journey or anyone else’s has been more difficult than that of the person who has had EVERYTHING that they have wanted up until a certain point in life, has been “yes-ed” to death, and suddenly the script flips or changes, even in the mildest of ways? when the script flips or changes (for “better” or for “worse”, by the way), we are in a big ego death. there is no measure or judgement on the relativity of one person’s process against another person’s process. yet, we each seem to judge our processes and compare and contrast against others’…
sooner or later we are each forced to acknowledge our own value. the Universe will teach this in a variety of ways. one way it will teach us our own value is by having that value invalidated CONSTANTLY. for example, if we grow up in a chaotic, abusive and all-around unsupportive home and with people who make us feel like shit, what is happening is that we are being FORCED to acknowledge our own value. because clearly it is NOT coming from an outside source (this is such a gift by the way, even when it feels torturous). in fact, we are being tested to develop an even stronger and earlier sense of self (if we can navigate the process, pass the tests to see through the illusions of the abuse and understand why it is happening/has happened) than the average person. what a huge blessing! the greatest gift I have ever received from the Universe is the gift of my OWN inner value and truth, separate from the opinions of anyone around me. it did NOT come from being honored, respected, yes-ed to death or any such experience.
conversely, the Universe will teach us our own value by giving us archetypal support/love from family, friends and the like. we may have a fairly “easy” life, and we may rely on those around us because we have never really faced adversity – however, that in and of itself IS adversity. adversity is always waiting at the door for us so that we can expand our consciousness. one day, one time, at some point, we will find ourselves in a situation that can not be fixed or filled by our former life of “ease”. we may notice that when our parents or siblings or loved ones die, that our sense of self and value and validation completely went with them. if our husband or wife suddenly leaves us and we have no immediate physical being to validate our existence, we may “lose” it. this singular experience may actually be relative to a lifetime of struggle to “find oneself”. being in a position where we never learn to fish because that is the way the Universe has set things up for us, can really test us when those who feed us disappear for some reason. separately, we may also notice that “normal” every day hardships seem to be so much harder for us to deal with than more “hardship-seasoned” peers or friends, and we may struggle more to recover from certain experiences. this does not make us weak! it makes us part of a divine plan of life experience and soul evolution.
there are blessings in the curses of each above “archetypal” scenario. I have always said that each human being gets the SAME deck of cards in life with a completely DIFFERENT hand. with whatever hand we get, I suggest looking to people we admire who have been through similar hardships (or lack thereof). this will help keep us out of self-judgement and/or judgement of those around us. things have been relative since the beginning of time. don’t judge your journey: whether you came from a loving home/past, or an abusive home/past, it is ALL relative.
it is normal to feel frustrated, even resentful with your mentor/teacher/guide/helper while in your “process”
today I received an email from someone I worked with a year ago. when I saw her, I knew she was in the thick of her spiritual awakening and dark night of the soul. it is really hard sometimes, from my position, to see a soul struggling SO hard but KNOW they are not only going to pull through to the other side but also create AMAZING things – and convince them of such. even with my book prerequisites and follow-up, a person usually struggles for a time before everything gels. each person is different in terms of how they view or experience this process, and that is the point of this blog post.
my patient mentioned in her email to me that she felt, at times after her session, frustrated in her process and upset toward me. obviously, those feelings are just distractions from the ego (not the person) which fears it own death and needs a target to point at. I applaud her so much for being able to be real and honest – clearly a sign of her awakened self. now, completely on the other side of her darkness and quoting my very first email to her (which she initially had trouble integrating and believing), she thanked me and completely validated our session together just one year ago. not only is she in the place I knew she would be, quite frankly it is even better than I anticipated! it feels magical to me. I also know that there is likely future mutual purpose between us that would be so powerful – this is the gift that keeps on giving when I select people to work with, as I see so many future pioneers of greatness (even when they are on their physical or metaphoric death beds when we meet).
I knew/know how she felt/feels, because there were times during my dark journeys when I would have some kind of therapy session or intuitive session with someone who was actively helping me from their heart, and I felt tempted to become aggravated with them when something didn’t line up in the timely manner I wanted it to. at times, it was easier to believe that they were telling me what I wanted to hear versus telling me the “truth”. I have records of a session or two with an intuitive helper of mine who told me explicitly what I now know: “you are in the darkest period of your life. you are here and you are coming out the other side. you are coming out the other side so that you can attract others in the same position and show them the way”. at the time, it sounded nice, but I didn’t fully believe it. it sounded, in fact, idealistic and so very far from where I was emotionally and psychologically. it was during a period of time when I couldn’t feel my own soul. I felt totally lost. I remember feeling annoyed with the reading at times, because in my ego’s mind I thought “well, then where is my stuff!?”. at times I wanted to yell at her (she would have yelled right back though, this was a take-no-shit woman!). it was a short time after, maybe a few months or maybe a year, when it all began to make sense. I looked back and felt badly for the energy I unintentionally sent in the direction of my helper, who saw what I could not see for myself. I did not know or understand the weight that I might have placed upon the shoulders of my helper, because I saw her as invincible/strong/complete. she was/is just a human, though. it wasn’t an email that I sent that may have added to her weight, but more so the energy I sent her way, praying she would help unburden me. I prayed for anyone to unburden me (I talk about this in my post about spiritual awakening and the dark night of the soul)! she ended up getting cancer, maybe because she gave too much, or maybe that was her body’s way of simply healing itself (when I work with cancer cases I usually see a being that is in a state of HEALING, not of sickening, as counter-intuitive as that may sound)…and thankfully she made it through and has been in remission for a while.
[as a sidenote: healers, intuitives and the like should be respected in the same vein as a traditional doctor, psychologist or lawyer in terms of time, hourly fees, and so on – and they are in no way responsible for our process or our free will! many people I see are extremely careful to ask about boundaries and intuitively respect them long before I would ever need to draw them. I am fortunate to attract a really conscientious group of people to my practice. somehow, healers seem to be generally less respected for their personal and professional time and boundaries; I know that in the not too distant future, that will cease to be the case as many legitimate healers and the profession of a healer become as mainstream as doctors. I know this because the number of doctors, scientists and mental health care professionals I see is staggering. two worlds are about to merge…]
now, I gladly but also consciously carry the burdens of ALL those I work with, past and present. I’m working with a format (born out of my own likes/dislikes I experienced with helpers along the way, and also just my own unique self-expression) that I have never seen anyone else work with, especially in terms of the amount of TIME I spend – and this puts me in a tremendous position of energetic vulnerability. which I sign up for. because I know I can handle it. I know I can handle it because I know both sides. when someone is sending me energy of resentment or anger, it allows me to feel more compassion for them because I KNOW they will make it through just like I did. I work very hard to keep my energy as high as it can possibly be so that nothing that does not belong to me can affect me – I can observe it, but it can not get in. I can still acutely observe it, though, and this is why I wanted to write this post having been on both sides.
if you are in a process and you are working with someone, have worked with someone, or will work with someone, know that you will still have to walk your own walk. just because you may not see the yellow brick road in its entirety in front of you the next day or week or month does not mean someone did not tell you the truth or give you the best advice possible. it means that you are being taught how to trust the divine. none of us ever gets a shortcut. if you feel frustrated, angry or even hateful toward one of your teachers/helpers, know that that is normal, too. if you realize it after the fact and feel badly about it, just let it go and send an energetic acknowledgement if you like (a good helper/healer will feel it without you having to tell them if you don’t want to). I have had more than one person apologize to me months after a session because they felt negative toward either me or the session in some way before coming completely full circle with themselves and their journey. the thing is, I already know if/when they have felt negatively about me and it doesn’t make me love them any less. this is the reason I do what I do, even when others are tempted to/do blame me. I’ve been in their shoes and the amount of compassion I have is huge (though, like my former helper/teacher, I also take no shit – there is acceptable and then there is unacceptable). the key to working with someone and to healing in general is to do our best to keep the focus upon ourselves at all times because it will expedite our process, no matter how shitty it feels.
the only reason anyone would ever try to hurt you is because they feel powerless
it took me a while to realize and fully understand this. in some ways, this post corresponds to my blog post about why we are attacked. the only reason anyone would ever try to hurt or negatively impact another person is because they feel powerless. it can be a challenge to 1) recognize this and 2) understand it and feel compassion toward that person. we can recognize it once we fully realize that nothing in this world is personal. nothing and none of it. when we assign meaning to another person’s behavior, we are personalizing it in some way. when we make it about us, personally, we have lost a lot of energy. there is a difference, by the way, between NOT TOLERATING certain behavior and not making it personal. I am pro not making it personal, but that doesn’t mean it should be tolerated. when we begin to understand another person’s behavior that we would otherwise personalize, because we know who we are and what we represent, we are able to see their own bubble/story around them. we can see that they need our light (attention) in some way, because they are deficient. some people are happy being deficient, even though they would claim otherwise. I’m sure that at some points in my life I was deficient in certain ways, even though I claimed otherwise. a good example of this would be holding onto a romantic relationship that completely drained me yet I wouldn’t leave.
anyhow, back to understanding the mechanics of someone’s hurtful behavior toward us. here is a most recent example: in my regular yoga class, there are two rows – front and back. each row is staggered with stickers so that students can stagger their mats and both be able to see themselves (important for yoga and balancing) in the mirror. sometimes the classes are truly too full and catching a sliver of yourself in the mirror is barely possible, and you just muscle through it with exception. recently, I was one of the first to arrive and I placed my mat in an area that wouldn’t require me to move left or right, and was super accommodating to new people entering the class. with an entirely open front row, a young woman came in a lined her mat up directly in front of mine. this rarely happens in this yoga class, and if it does and someone is aware they have lined up directly blocking another person, they are quick to fix it (especially after the other person already set themeslves up). if I moved to the left, I would have been standing directly in front of the teacher and taking up two spots. then she lined up a mat to the right for her friend. at this point, if I moved to the right, I would again be taking up two spots due to where I was positioned. after she lined up her mat (directly in front of me, it couldn’t have been measured any better, in fact), I asked her if she would move it a few inches to the right. she gave me a snide response and asked me to move one way or another. I knew right away, energetically, that she needed a feeding. when this happens, I am aware of any, if at all, emotional response I might have. I can easily feel the unease of others and even when they are rude, I am normally able to develop compassion for them and totally diffuse their feelings of anger etc. in this case, there really was nowhere for me to move and it also became a completely full class. the woman in front of me, however, had ample space to work with and she was practicing alongside her friend. as soon as the class was about to start, she deliberately looked at her friend and smiled and moved her mat back directly in front of mine. it was an obvious baiting situation, since it would have been quite easy for me to look like a jerk, if I actually further asserted myself. we’ve all been there. while this was happening, I kept asking myself “ok, what is my test here? to see how I respond to her? to see how I feel? why did I invite this?”. then, she stood directly in front of me so that I could not see a sliver of myself. I was not even centered on my mat. I knew that no matter which way I went, she would purposely block me. and she did. gosh, she needed FUEL! the entire rest of the class, which lasted 90 minutes, she went out of her way to block me. there was no maybe about it. I can’t imagine the kind of energy she had to put out to do this. she went completely out of her way to be an asshole, instead of just focusing on her own self and her own class. because I am pretty mellow, neutral and kind (for the most part), I notice that people often horribly confuse my kindness with weakness. when they do this, I pray for them – because tampering with kindness can really knock someone down. if I willingly send a bad energy to someone, whether they have wronged me or not, I had better look out (read my last post on karma) — the laws of karma and reciprocity do not sit well with that kind of intent. I was able to completely (with some effort) zone out and focus on my class, as I noticed her completely obsessed with my energy. but WHY was she obsessed with it? because she couldn’t make me bleed. she couldn’t make me mad. my blood would mean her food. her internal lacking, of whatever variety it was lacking, was so strong that she could no longer feed herself from the inside out. her own self-hatred, of some variety, was so loud that she had to search outside of herself to get her angry needs met. but, I didn’t supply her with food. I saw her for the angry and deficient being that she was at that time (I am not suggesting she is or will be that for life or in all cases, though this was quite an exceptional case I must say), and I felt compassion toward the fact that she didn’t have enough love to not act on such offense. she wasn’t even on the defense – she was on the offense because I literally gave her no fuel. sometimes no fuel calms people down. not in this case. it was a red hot one!
throughout the class, during which I was nearly forced to focus on HER since I could not see anything else, I was presented with the opportunity as to how to FEEL about her. I could have chosen complete anger. I could have chosen to take it personally. instead, I chose to have compassion for it, but NOT ALLOW IT. I pictured the back of her head and her body as stained glass. I accepted the fact that I could not see the outline of my body, because every time I moved she moved to block me. I accepted it and suddenly began THANKING it. I was able to remove myself from the situation, from her, from what it “meant” about me personally that this was happening, and I was grateful for the challenge. in the past, it would have disempowered me. instead, I felt more empowered than ever. in the past, I might have actually not only felt bad for her, but wanted to GIVE her my energy to help her through the class even though she was so nasty to me. this time, I focused ONLY on my energy. this did take some work, because the nature of the situation was frankly just so obnoxious. I saw that as I was able to zone out and make her and her attempts completely invisible, I not only didn’t have to feel her disempowerment but I felt completely protected. I noticed that nothing she did could any longer connect with a belief/inner contract I had about being a victim — hence, there was no food/fuel/blood to shed. what began to happen was interesting, but not unfamiliar to me as a great number of people have tried to mess with me in a similar regard throughout my entire life – and it never works in their favor: she began to get weak. now, I know she is a strong girl and a regular practitioner, so seeing her fall out of postures and lose steam was interesting. I had to refocus every time this happened, because every time I focused on her I could feel her desperate for food/fuel/blood/energy. for her, the only kind of energy she was able to survive on was NEGATIVE energy. this is why it is SO crucial to not fall into the trap of sending hate to someone who is trying to bring you down. the exchanged hate or low vibrational feelings are like a fine feast for them – it matches exactly where they are at during those moments, and it feeds them. not everyone can eat a fine meal like this, but some people can and will go to great lengths for either part of all of their lives to do so. all humans are equal, all energies are not.
finally, nothing and no one can touch us unless we somehow agree to what they are doing or saying. it must match us in some way. for those curious about “psychic attacks”, well yes, people do attempt to do such. but a “psychic attack” can only succeed if the intended party is in alignment and agreement with the intention of the attacker. Teal Swan has a good video on this: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=wB4h7LptqAc
the biggest thing I want to express here is that NO ONE can disempower you. there will be those who will try. especially if you reflect something back to them that they either feel they can not have, do not understand how to access, or do not understand period. don’t be their food. eventually, if they go hungry, they will have to hunt for their own food — which often comes in the form of an unpleasant spiritual awakening (or something else).
Shubhika is a beautiful woman and a beautiful soul. as a person with a strong corporate background, like most patients I see, her natural analytical and diagnostic skills are a true complement to our work together. I also could not have asked for a more kind, connected and intuitive individual to connect with through my work. I am so grateful to her for working with me and for sharing her experience here. her contribution to humanity and the process of awakening is substantial.
when we are obsessively focused upon someone or something, the joke is always on us. it doesn’t matter whether this focus is negative or positive. we might come up with many “logical” reasons as to “why” xyz person or persons “affect us” or “others” (there is no such thing as being concerned that someone or something is affecting others if we do not first believe that it somehow affects us) and use that as our excuse for focus. what we are missing, during our “logical” over-focus either negatively or positively upon a person(s), is that 1) everything we see/focus upon is a reflection of ourSELF and ourselves – period. the collective reflection. no matter how great in number, size, power, etc that person or thing is. 2) everything we see/focus upon is an OPPORTUNITY to learn. but because many of us live so much in the ego, in the 3d realms, we can’t hear our own truth or see the bigger picture.
since forever ago, people and ideas have been in place in society thanks to the Universe in order to test us individually. and, conversely, the people put in place in order to test us have their own tests. it is never a one way street. these tests grow and expand us so that we may look within for greater (real) happiness. the Kardashians, as a modern-day example, represent many things, as well as excellent tests that exist for a myriad of reasons. for one, they test the human ego in terms of helping us to know that we are “enough” as we are. when we resent something in the 3d ego world: looks, status, money and the like, we are resenting the very opportunity within ourselves to ever achieve peace and balance with that “thing” we resent. we can not resent something and receive it at the same time! I have had friends who complain CONSTANTLY about money, and the “1%”. do you think those friends will EVER be happy or even stable within their own personal confines as long as they are complaining because they are negatively focused? no (it is also irrelevant, by the way, “right” or “wrong” when we are overly-focused whether we are negatively overly-focused or positively overly-focused, it doesn’t matter – over-focus is a state of being in which we are taken completely out of our core SELF, which is where the focus should be. on the SELF. otherwise we are just spinning our wheels). do I agree with the issues that some of my friends in the above example raise? maybe. also maybe not. do I share their same negative focus? no way! this negative focus isn’t even a REAL negative focus, by the way…it is a form of self-escapism. as long as we can BLAME another person for our issues, we get to be like convenient Christians or Catholics! – we don’t have to do the self WORK.
when we look at the example of the Kardashians, we see a few obvious things at first: we see physical aesthetics, we see riches, we see fame, and we see attention. when we are out of alignment with our own story, those things take on different meanings to each of us. if we feel we are never “enough” in one or all of these categories that we covet, comment on negatively or obsess over, guess what? the joke is on us to throw shade or hate! what we should be doing is THANKING these people, the Kardashians or whomever in the like capacity, for highlighting what does not work and is stuck inside of US. NOTHING can make us feel badly about ourselves unless we already agree to that thing we say makes us feel bad. no one can make us feel bad about ourselves unless we already agree with them – whether they are saying it directly, or we perceive them to be saying it. in a way, modern-day social media is doing us a favor; it is reflecting back lots of “ideals” to help us wake up and contend with our own inner demons. so whether we “idolize” someone or “hate” them, the joke is on us.
let me explain what I mean by the word joke. I say it is a joke, because the over-focus of people I hear obsessively complain about or obsessively envy the Kardashians and others in their position, is exactly the blessing in disguise. what these complainers or copycats are getting either way is a match in the outer world to an inner belief that they need to contend with. if you ask me, the so-called negativity of social media, reality TV and so on is part of our planet’s awakening. those of us who are able to realize that the reason we focus negatively upon another person or persons is born out of our own inner lack are in a great position to wake up. those of us who are able to realize that the reason we focus in an idolizing or copycat fashion is born out of our own need to see how amazing WE already are, are in a great position to wake up. again: either focus, negative or positive, is focus and we get what we focus on. I have said this in many other blog posts: where attention goes, energy flows. if you don’t like that thing you are so focused upon, ask yourself WHY you are so focused upon that thing, and how that thing might actually SERVE you.
as a side note, and kind of an unnecessary one to explaining how our focus is born out of our own inner world and how it is actually a gift or blessing in disguise, I will say that the person or thing that we are so focused upon has its OWN lessons. we might think that something or someone who drives us to feel so strongly inside has infinite power or power over us in some way. of course that is not true. ALL THINGS ARE RELATIVE. all blessings are relative. how could we assume that, for example, all of their relative success/access/etc (whatever we want to deem as important to us) does not come with an equal amount of tests of its own? we assume that life is easy for those we covet, envy or focus upon, then again, the joke is on us. the Universe is built in terms of relativity. for every huge blessing, there are lessons of initiation around it. who is to say that, despite whether we feel negatively or positively about the Kardashians or anyone else like them, we would ever be able to handle their blessings given the laws of relativity? it is suffice to say that MANY of us could NEVER handle what they have, EVEN IF they themselves have created it or it has been created for them. we do not ever know the exact reasons or divine plans the Universe has for certain people and matters in the press, other than the fact that for “better” or “worse” they are here to serve us and reflect our individual and collective issues. now, whether self-perpetuated or not in a public fashion, that’s a huge energetic responsibility these people have. again: this is a neutral and energetic perspective, not a dissection of people or events. when we ZOOM OUT in this way, we can see the bigger picture and not get wrapped in the tiny details that are, again, designed and there to test us like the joker.
anything or anyone who has ever affected me negatively or positively in my life, I say thank you to it/them. saying thank you inside or directly to them does NOT mean that I always agree with what they have done. but we reach a certain level of self-introspection where we realize that the Universe has actually designed ALL things to help us, if we can figure out what that blessing is. by staying attached or focused upon something or someone in the outside world, we are again being convenient Christians/Catholics. all of the real juice is withIN us. if we dare to exercise our inner divine muscles.
in some ways, I am really glad I did not grow up with social media and even the internet until I was almost an adult. I look at many of today’s millennials and I have no idea whether they are humans or robots. I probably missed this boat by about 8 years. there is such a disconnect between many of their views on the world and mine, simply due to the fact that social media exists. however, I am not suggesting or blaming social media for causing something bad – in fact, it is quite the opposite. if we can see how disconnected we are and how out of touch we are with our higher selves, perhaps only then can a true individual and collective awakening take place. when I see how affected young girls (or even women!) are by electronic devices and the lives of others, I see that what once took lifetimes is happening instantly: ego destruction. the ego must eat us and destroy us in order to be transcended (this is a separate blog, by the way, the impact of social media on our culture).
the best thing we can ever do when something “affects us” individually or collectively, is THANK IT. if you are feeling “but….” or “if…..” or “how…..” during or after reading this blog relative to believing or taking issue with how/why the Kardashians or others like them are in some way harmful to society or to those you know, remember one thing: nothing can negatively affect us unless we have an individual or collective need for that person or thing to “negatively” affect us…and, in doing so, it will ALWAYS be reflecting the very thing we need to heal from within OURSELVES. that, my friends, is called AWAKENING and HEALING. otherwise, the joke is on us.
karma is immediate right now; a quantum mechanical look at how/why
karma, or the law of cause and effect (from intangible to tangible), has always been in place on our planet. behind karma is intent or intention. intent or intention is the driving force or energy behind the deed or action that creates what we refer to as karma. intention may be expressed simply through thought, or it may be expressed through action. either way, a karmic wheel of effect is at play.
in earlier decades or centuries, our planet and the humans on it existed mostly in the 3rd dimension / 3d. in this dimension, we are dealing with denser and more static “realities”, which don’t seem to bend or shift easily or quickly. however, our current linear experience of time and space has moved beyond 3d – this is how and why we are able to interact with the intangible i.e. the internet. the internet – wavelengths and signals do not exist in 3d. we are 3d humans interacting with a 4d or 5d essence. before the internet we have electricity – electricity produces a 4d+ effect, which is the effect and perception of “light” or energy in motion. but we do not interact with it FROM the vantage point of the dimension upon which it exists. we don’t “see” or “know” how it works the same way that we see or know how to use a smartphone or a laptop computer that is not attached to wires. the fact that we are now interacting and interfacing with objects from their very perspective or dimensional frequency (in a back and forth communicative fashion, akin to human language and response) is evident of the fact that we have collectively experienced a shift, and we are experiencing time and space differently as our planet travels through the galaxy and moves beyond the 3rd and 4th dimensions.
parallel realities: we are what we expose ourselves to. where attention goes, energy flows.
one of the reasons I am particular about who I work with / when I work with them is the simple fact that whatever is going on their life WILL indeed show up in mine. even if very briefly. this is, of course, how I get bombarded with information for / about a person before I see them. without even trying. in fact, I never TRY (this is why it was so hard for me to “come out of the closet” with this work – it was initially less of a choice and almost more of a forced calling from beyond me). this is simply the way that I am made (acutely aware of the intangible realms), although we are all predisposed to the similar, most people just don’t acknowledge it. I can speak with someone for five minutes, and all of a sudden whatever is happening in their life begins to happen in mine (signs and symbols appear at lightning speed), and I don’t / can’t always make sense of it on the spot (the Universe has its own plans for my personal expansion, too!). for example:
I saw a new patient about a month ago. I had gone about my day per usual – slept a ton the night before, detoxed/sweat for a couple of hours, limited my contact with the outside world and ate really incredible foods. when she arrived, she was a lovely person of course (I might add that I can count on one hand the number of people I have worked with who I would not consider lovely – and meeting them was simply there for my own soul’s expansion and awareness). she IS a lovely person, and I am really super excited for what she is creating in her life now. the world will be hearing from her shortly. anyhow, she sat down and about half an hour into our session, I felt the stress and anxiety of having my boundaries crossed. within moments, someone was knocking on the door. mind you, on the outside of the door I have a big taped note that reads “please do not knock on this door, and please do not ring this bell”. I knew it was not an emergency, and I knew that no one else on the premises would do this. even UPS does not dare knock or ring. I hoped perhaps this person would leave. he did not. he continued to ring the bell and knock on the door! finally, I went to the door and told him to leave. he insisted I open the door. I did not. I was momentarily embarrassed in front of my new patient, because nothing like this had ever happened before nor did I expect it. however, I KNEW it had everything to do with her session. but, how could I tell her that barely an hour into meeting me, and being TOTALLY brand new to the meta/quantumphysical worlds? not to mention her own awareness of her private life that was about to expand ten-fold and we hadn’t even touched on that yet? she was visibly concerned and I tried to downplay how annoyed I was that this person was bothering us. he came back again and I had to call the police. he ended up leaving before they would have arrived so I called it off. little did he know, I have surveillance in my window that I would later see recorded him canvassing the premises for an hour. in the light of day. obviously it was not a real estate broker, delivery man, service repair man etc. he was of the perpetrator and boundary violator variety.
we then continued our session and I knew I had met a friend for life. this new patient was and is incredible. I let her know that the commotion at the beginning of the session would make sense later, and that I would explain it at the right time. I did not elaborate on the fact that I knew that this man who was bothering us represented someone who was then part of my patient’s life. the reality of the person in my patient’s life had not fully and clearly presented itself yet, though, so I absolutely held off on telling her that he was a symbol of xyz person. it was SO specific in my mind, though!
a couple of weeks after our session, my patient called me to tell me a scary story about having her boundaries crossed – and that the person I saw during the session who represented the perpetrator at the door of our session was at the helm of it. more specifically, this person in her life who she was putting active boundaries around after our session had actually managed to get inside of her home when she was not there. when she arrived, she had to call the police. the similarity of the energy of the perpetrator at the door of our session and the energy of the person who let themselves into my patient’s apartment unannounced forcibly and would not leave, was uncanny. and I had known the symbolism the moment the man showed up at the door during our session together. when I spoke with her about all of it, it made immediate sense and further sense to both of us as to the connection. the point here is, I drew in HER reality – right to MY door. her reality literally and physically knocked at my door. talk about the Universe being LOUD.
this is a perfect example of energy in motion, showing up in tangible form. this is why it is SO important to watch our thoughts and keep ourselves as aligned as possible. whatever we are thinking is simultaneously forming itself. now, there is DEFINITELY a delay from 5d to 3d manifestation, so do not worry yourself about some of your negative thoughts. also, one positive thought outweighs many many many negative thoughts. I might be a rare case, due to the work that I do, in which I literally see and experience in 3d form the nature of the session I am about to have. it often shows up before, during and after a session. if it is an illness such as cancer, I will experience it in the part of my body associated with the person I am to see. I will walk down the street and hear about it as I pass strangers in conversation before I see new said patient. and if I do not properly take care of myself after a session with the proper rest, alone time, detox and food, I will develop symptoms that would ordinarily send your average Jane to the doctor for a checkup.
I will make it clear again that my experiences are most definitely exaggerated by the Universe to assist me with doing the work that I do. but, I want to get the message out there that even though it might be expedited for me, it is not any more true or real than it is for everyone else. we are all part of the Universe, and what we think / feel / who we communicate with DOES indeed become part of our lives. I have learned the hard way in the past, and even in the not so distant past. sometimes if I am not in a session but just going about my every day life, I miss signs and symbols. for example a couple of months ago, I was sitting and talking with someone I had been spending time with to help them with a project. my sacral was literally bleeding when I was in their presence, and I did not have my menstrual cycle at that time. I also felt like it was hard to urinate when I was in their presence. at the time, I thought perhaps I was picking up on someone I was recently in a session with or even someone else in my immediate physical environment. I was missing the signal from the Universe that was letting me know: the person in front of you who are giving your time and energy to is literally drawing blood from a stone (and you are the stone, because there is no blood left for them to draw from you). this person was toxic, vampiric and dishonest. obviously I was blindsided and surprised as I would never intentionally spend time around someone like this. but, it was just another lesson the Universe was giving me, and this one was harder than past lessons. they really veiled this person and made it hard for me to see his truth. however, the very next day after the random bleeding and kidney pain, everything became abundantly clear; I found out some very clear-cut lies and misdeeds of this person (*side-note: this occurred during a month-long binge watch of American Greed! [makes headachey face] I won’t bother posting an explanation as to why, other than the fact that I simply enjoyed the show*). thankfully I was able to cut him off like cancer and get back on the track of my physical, spiritual and emotional power and energy force. things like this no longer affect me for more than a day or two, whereas in the past they would affect me for weeks or months. it is amazing to have built this endurance through suffering tricks and illusions. I now welcome the tricks and illusions because I learn so much!
when I mention parallel realities, I do so in the sense that we begin to mirror another person’s reality VERY fast with even minimal exposure to them. even if we do not see the signs and symbols of such. another person’s reality is only an intangible (parallel, potential reality) expression of our 5d exposure to them, until it becomes 3d. if we do not focus heavily enough on them or for too long, or if our own belief system totally defies what they represent, we will likely never see a 3d manifestation of their reality into ours. if and when we do, what arises is that we pull in the other person’s reality and merge it with ours after we have given it enough focus or attention. there are infinite possible parallel realities! for example if we have a lot of positive things happening in our life, the other person might soon or eventually notice the same happening in theirs. this can change or stop at any time, if one party is carrying all of the burden or work or if one party decides they do not want the same things as the other party. if both parties remain in contact while being on different tracks, discord can occur and we can become misaligned. the Universe will speak to us even louder at that point to see if we “get it” (i.e. my sacral issues with the second person mentioned in this blog). when we are engaging with a person who is purely positive and we are purely positive (what I mean by purely positive is that we are not negatively focused, we live in a constant state of surrender and forgiveness and we are as aligned as we can hope to be), we can manifest a lot quicker and at a more loving vibration. suddenly we will notice even more “strokes of luck”. if our encounter with another person is very brief, we still pull in that person’s reality for a short time. it may be minutes, and it may be days. this is why meditation, cord-cutting and exercise and self-awareness is so important (what we subconsciously believe about ourselves or our lives is directly tied to merging realities / parallel realities, and I have covered that in other blogs). we literally get what we focus upon. and it happens at LIGHTNING speed BEHIND the scenes before it shows up in 3d, and then we are surprised as to how/why xyz showed up. being conscious and aware is the best thing we can do to ensure we are constantly recycling energy not necessary for us.
this is one of the reasons psychic readings are so difficult – difficult in terms of accuracy. if a reader reads for someone who has a certain set of beliefs and then they go and change those beliefs, they alter their entire reality. psychic readings (GOOD ONES) can be good when used as weather maps only – if they are used as crutches, they will never work. if they are used as guides and the person getting the reading knows themself very well, they can be very helpful.
start paying attention to the conversations and general traffic in your life, and the people in it. look at what is happening in another person’s life or how they choose to live their life, and see what is showing up in yours around your communication with them. if you watch a particular tv show often, pay attention to what nuances of the show you see show up in your own life the next day after watching. if you are a negative speaker and complain about politics all day and complain about how unfair the world is with zero focus on solution, watch how disappointed you will continue to be with people on a daily basis. thoughts, words, experiences and emotions are all energy in motion — 5d to 3d. this is not bs, this is standard physics. you can control a lot more in your life than you realize. we are what we expose ourselves to, period.
parallel realities: we are what we expose ourselves to. where attention goes, energy flows.
*because you think I am hard to get/book with, and only because you think I am hard to get/book with. I don’t play games with taking on new patients in terms of hitting numbers/goals or maxing out my time; rather, I take the time to feel into each phone call returned and whether it is the right person and right time. I don’t care if I never did another session again if in fact the right person and time did not present themselves. I want all intentions to be divine.
*because you read all of the yelp testimonials and think someone else’s experience will mean that yours will be the same. each person I see has an acute sense of timing and readiness for a session. no two people will have the same experience. that said, I look for the right person/time i.e. opportunity to present a knock-out transformation experience. no guarantees are implied or stated across the board, a lot of it is simply up to the person and whether they are truly willing to surrender to their own process. this is why I do NOT accept referrals, and I will not work with people who know one another unless it is a truly rare/exceptional case.
*because energy work is trendy or cool. my work is deep, I know what I am doing, and I know that I am not the right person for everyone. there is nothing trendy or cool about talking the talk of “spirituality” and transformation without walking the walk — walking the walk into transformation is a super duper challenge. many folks only get there on their actual physical death bed. I have said no to many news articles and interviews about my sessions because my work is not something that I consider mainstream and applicable to the masses – therefore sensationalizing and advertising such would work in opposition to the desire I have: to attract matches to my work that supersede appearance, trend and so on. I am however finding appropriate ways to advertise that which CAN apply to many people at once, such as multimedia and other relative means of communication i.e. books/workshops.
*because you had energy work before and are looking simply for your “new person” that you can go to when you feel like you need a boost. no two people are the same, therefore no two practitioners are the same. I do not know how to work the way anyone else does. my work can be like gutting a fish – stirring the swamp of the unconscious mind – purging the soul. this isn’t what everyone wants or needs at a particular time.
*because you are on a budget and hoping that my session [which is hours and hours of both quantifiable and unquantifiable (prior to the session definitely unquantifiable) time] will be in the ball park of someone else’s one or two hour rate.
I am always willing and able to provide healer references in my place, people I have treated myself and who are natural healers and now have their own practices. I am not affiliated with their businesses at this point in any way, I just want to help people get to the right/best person for them.