jealousy. control. envy. anger. hatred. paranoia and suspicion. these are important emotions to process and let GO of. however, when we go the route of projecting those feelings onto another human being, whether we believe in the moment we are justified or not, we are actually only creating more of the same for ourselves.
I feel a variety of feelings. every day. one feeling I do NOT identify with is jealousy. since I was small, I gave and gave and gave. I had many things stolen from me. I kept giving anyhow. I had titles stolen from me on films I was producing years ago. I had my time stolen, and I had my heart energy stolen (always only temporarily, of course). and yet, I continued and continue to give no matter what is happening in my life. because the one feeling I never felt was jealousy. this is because, somehow, by the grace of my intrinsic self and no matter what I had been through, I still felt FULL. inside my heart. never once did I feel the need to “get even”, fire back or teach anyone a lesson. I believe this served me very well. it is why I have been able to build a very successful practice for myself. there have been so many people who I have given to, who have done the unthinkable. oh well! my thought process behind such was and is very simply this: the way someone treats me is the way they treat themSELVES (and usually worse). I have always treated my “enemies” with respect – because I feel bad for them. sure, I have journaled, ranted or cried, but I have never sent back one ounce of hate. I don’t believe in it. because when we live in truth, WE NEED NO DEFENSE (unless, of course, what someone is doing is illegal or outright harmful – with that in mind, the ONLY route is the OFFENSE to protect one’s general well being).
what we often fail to remember is the physics of karma. it’s not even about being “a better person”. it is about having enough in our CORE, no matter how broken, broke or obliterated we feel, to decide what kind of a core we want to maintain. the physics of karma is super real deal. I work with a number of scientists and doctors who understand how to actually MEASURE the vibration of a thought, intention or action (in the coming years I will be developing my own measure and dissertations through years and years of case studies with my own patients who I have worked with), hence my book prereq by Hawkins (power versus force), a book I discovered in the 90s as I began to articulate my understanding of the physics of human thought and behavior. another benefit of understanding the physics of karma is that we can let go more easily – at a young age, I decided that it just must not be ABOUT ME, in terms of what I experienced in the world around me. not taking things personally has been the biggest tool in my arsenal, though I am constantly working at it. if you look at that concept deeply, study it daily as I have from a young age, you will see your reality shift.
I know many people who study ways to “return the energy to sender” etc (burning candles, doing rituals, etc). and that is fine, but for reasons above, I suppose, I never had that desire – and the reason I never had that desire is because I naturally and intrinsically understood the law of physics as it applies to emotion, intention and action. I can not think of ONE person on this planet who has abused me, wronged me, cursed me with anger, or been generally inappropriate with me who has not suffered. when I was young this would happen, I would see it, and I would feel too guilty to defend myself on top of it – because I KNEW that the way someone was treating me was not nearly as bad as the way they were (often unconsciously) treating themselves. in other words: WHEN PEOPLE HURT YOU THEY ARE NOT HURTING YOU – THEY ARE HURTING THEMSELVES. ultimately, no one can hurt you. it is just a matter of quickly we arrive at that realization/destination. when we look at a pure energy, with our own projection of lack and/or anger, and we throw all kinds of shit at it (no matter the reason), we will see that returned multi-fold. never piss off the angels! even as a very small child I subconsciously understood the physics of karma.
we must be so careful what we put out. if someone has hurt you or abused you, deal with your feelings about it in a healthy way (writing, crying, dancing, working out) that works for you. in many of my sessions I suggest writing an ultimate rant letter that you later burn and obviously never send. but the moment you meet that energy that you hate, and engage with it, you have lost. LOST. instead, stay in your lane. it is a matter of moments, days or weeks before you will see the bed that someone has made for themselves. at the end of the day, it is impossible for someone to hurt you. we actually reap what we sow, and knowing this in my core has always brought me tremendous peace – even in the midst of the most awful situations.
so there is this very simple thought of the day: people don’t treat you the way they feel about you – they treat you the way they feel about themSELVES. and, projecting any kind of dark onto any kind of light will certainly have its ramifications – for the projector, for the sender. you may not see what or how right away, but believe me – I have yet to experience one situation in my personal life where that is not the case. this is a big part of the reason that, no matter what has happened to me, I live with peace in my heart. and, late at night, I actually pray for my enemies. because I know what is to come in the way of their experience. believe it, people.
for more on this, I suggest my eBooklet on the physics of karma.
January is the perfect time of year to take a step back, introspect, and look at your life to assess what aspects are working and what areas can be improved upon. It’s a great forced reboot.
If you know what needs to be done in your life to achieve your professional goals, keep doing what you’re doing. But what if you’re at a crossroads in life and feeling stuck? Should you start your own business? What are the risks of reinventing yourself? Or if you’re already an entrepreneur or creative type who’s temporarily lost their confidence what’s the best way to reinvigorate yourself?
More importantly with the endless self-help and professional development seminars available for entrepreneurs online who will happily take your money to tell you how to achieve success whose advice should you trust?
For over a decade Aryn Elaine, the founder of Energy Medicine & Reiki Therapy by Elaine, has discretely consulted with the world’s most powerful and influential people at their own crossroads including award-winning actors, politicians, doctors, entrepreneurs, C-level executives, artists, global investment bankers, and United Nations diplomats.
Elaine is a Reiki Practitioner, an Ordained Minister, a medical intuitive, healer, and energy medicine specialist with a strong sense for identifying blocks and blazing through them with her patients while collaborating with various doctors to bridge the gap between the spiritual and medical. Her sessions consist of intuitive consulting and energetic therapy (both in person and remotely) in an uncharted format specifically to treat those at a serious juncture in their lives.
“After years of ‘working’ on people without even realizing it I learned how to specifically channel my energy to help others,” says Elaine. “I was helping people to heal deep wounds, detach from addictions, and find the courage to pursue their wildest dreams. I operate from a very grounded and powerful base, and I use the power of intuition, experience, education, and healing heart energy to help change the lives of others. I dropped my clinical psych studies years ago because I didn’t understand the boxes. Now I treat successful psychotherapists and psychiatrists.”
The focus of Elaine’s work is to retrieve the unconscious debris of her clients’ psyches and piece them back together in alignment. She then helps to re-integrate these lost pieces of self through further conversation and Reiki healing treatments to re-process the truth of the unconscious mind—all of which create a new reality or a new lens for the patient to look through.
“It is the patient’s unconscious territory that I am able to spot a mile away, even the pieces that they have forgotten or dissociated from, and it is with this territory that we create the bridge between body-mind-spirit”, Elaine tells me.
As a successful entrepreneur herself, the foundation of Elaine’s work is to help people uncover their gifts to create the business of their dreams and help them see it through.
“More than half of the people I see leave their ‘day jobs’ within weeks or months and begin their own businesses or enterprises,” says Elaine. “Intrinsic self-starters are my biggest conversion. I would honestly say 90% or more of whom I see are born to work for themselves and are stuck in some ‘system’. They are working with me to find their purpose that has been in them all along (hence the healing of unconscious aspects). I have helped hundreds of people with various backgrounds start their own businesses”.
Elaine has consulted behind the scenes with some of the world’s most recognizable actors, thought leaders, and entrepreneurs so to accommodate the growing demand she is unveiling the Super Luxury Session, which is a 45-day immersive reboot that starts at $65K.
“I have contracted a supportive relationship and agreement with a 5-star and notably exclusive luxury hotel (in NYC) whose personnel understand first-hand my dealings as well as the nuances of my very personal session/program—this includes but is not limited to coordination with property security which is active 24/7”, says Elaine.
Since not everyone will have the opportunity to work with Elaine, I asked her for a few simple tips she would suggest for anyone feeling stuck and at their own crossroads in life.
Give When You Have Nothing To Give
People are at their computers all day and need to connect with other humans. Do a good deed face to face and pay it forward every day. Small or big. It doesn’t matter. It’s all about the intent and what that action could lead to.
Look To Those Who Inspire You
There is always someone to look up to who will light our way. When you feel down, defeated, or anything else negative, look to those who inspire you and tune into how hard their journey to “success” was for both inspiration and perspective.
Exhaust The Body and Quiet the Mind
If your mind is unsteady you will not be able to process anything especially big life changing decisions. Your mind is like a computer hard drive when you clean it out so to speak it performs better. When your mind is cluttered exhaust the body physically in any way you can. Yoga, Pilates, spinning, bootcamp etc. help move stagnant energy and releases hormones that make you feel good and help quiet the anxiety of the mind.
Watch What You Put Into and On Your Body
Pay attention to anything you put into your body. You are what you eat and you will match the resonance of what you put into your system. The same goes for what you put on your body. Chemicals change your physiology and alter your state. Try to eat as cleanly as possible and use products that are chemical free. You should also be mindful of who you spend time with, what you read, watch, and listen to since we internalize all of these experiences and match it.
For more information about Elaine and her work you can visit her website.
ALIGNMENT: thoughts=words=feelings=actions. this is really hard to do. but the more we practice it, the more aligned we become.
we can NOT become successful while being consistently misaligned. also, alignment doesn’t always know “good” from “bad”; take for example an extreme sociopath or serial killer – their thoughts, words, feelings and actions may actually line up, because they are missing a piece of conscience. however those of us with a conscience can not get away with falling flat in one of the four elements of alignment and actually BE in alignment.
when we live in mixed signals within ourselves, we are lying to ourselves over and over. we might actually come to believe these lies. however, we will be indefinitely misaligned. things will continue to fall flat for us or not work out. there is no room for success in misalignment. sure, we may GET BY – pay our rent and be able to eat. but if we have big dreams, goals and ambitions, we will never reach them without the consistent practice of alignment and, just as important, awareness of our alignment (or lack thereof at different times). we don’t have to be perfect to succeed, and we don’t have to be in alignment every second of the day – but we do have to be truthful to ourselves about where we actually do stand with our thoughts, words, feelings and actions, and we must ask: DO THEY MATCH? are they equal? do they line up? are they each one in the same? and if not, we must make the effort toward matching them. the effort alone IS ALIGNMENT. we can not fool the universe with pretending, either. we can not lie to ourselves and expect to grow.
alignment is always the key factor in the success of the very special people I get to meet. some of them have not yet created their outer world picture of success, either because they are young, or because they have recently had some kind of awakening that showed them the importance of alignment. however they are on the fast track to the outer world success that I see with those who have already landed – those who are in 100% alignment because they PRACTICE it constantly. those who take the time to examine their thoughts, words, feelings and actions, and ask themselves DAILY: does this line up or not? the answers will always point someone away from misalignment, and in the direction of alignment.
alignment is truth, and truth is important. there are so many myths around this. I see people stumbling around, wondering why they missed out on an opportunity, why they can’t get ahead, or why “someone else” was able to do xyz. ALIGNMENT, people.
“who stole your magic?” she said to me – “someone stole your magic”. just under a decade ago I went for acupuncture. the acupuncturist could see what I had been feeling for a long time – there was a huge dissonance between where I “was” in life, and where I knew I “should” be. I couldn’t seem to get my head around what was wrong, or why I was experiencing such blocks. it would take me until last year to fully realize where my magic had gone…
think of the elephant chained to the tree analogy. a young elephant is chained to a tree so that he will not leave. after a while, the chain is removed, but the elephant won’t wander. he stays there. the metaphor of the chain is still alive and well for him, ingrained in his psyche. he can leave – but he CAN NOT LEAVE. one might consider how this happens all of the time in life with humans, through psychological and emotional conditioning. any one of us can have our magic stolen. and like a thief in the night, we will not see where it has gone or who took it — UNTIL WE CALL IT BACK…
who would steal our magic? first of all, anyone without a true identity of their own would compulsively steal our magic if we are susceptible. children, for example, have the MOST vibrant energy of all, and they are most easily controlled as they love unconditionally. the magic of a child can be snuffed out quite easily – sometimes in an instant, but usually over time. it doesn’t happen only to children. and, it happens, across the board, through a breaking of the will. our will can also be broken through osmosis, i.e. repeated exposure – consider highly negative media and advertising. who else would steal our magic? – anyone with an agenda to control.
we must consider our magic at all times – magic is the zest for life, the inner peace, the ability to sleep through the night, the desire to make the world a better place. that is our magic. if that is missing, we must find out first who/what stole it in order to know where it went. our belief systems will first indicate to us as to where to look; i.e. “I’m not worthy” or “I’m ugly” or “I’m not successful” or “I’m inherently flawed” or “I’m a fraud” – how, where and when did these messages break into our soul? we must thoroughly investigate. so that we may go back and retrieve our magic.
we don’t just “lose” pieces of ourselves as we get older – we do, however, run on less and less fuel depending upon what has been TAKEN from us. finding the thief can be a decade-long battle or more. if it were so simple and easy, then I would not have the thriving practice that I have. and the mainstream news would not be what it is. having our magic stolen might be a crime, but not investigating that crime and living beneath our highest ability is an even greater crime against ourselves – therefore it is our responsibility to solve it. we must first identify it, then own it (i.e. accept that it happened, that it is real), and then RELEASE IT.
when I fully called my magic back not so long ago, I saw – in what felt like an instant – the thieves and the agenda. I also saw and felt what parts of my body that magic left from. the liberation I felt as a result of discovering the core/spores of magic robbed is something I have no words for. this was something I had not been prepared to see any sooner. like that elephant chained to the tree, I believed so deeply that I was not free.
call it a fantastic therapist, a 12 step program, an ayahuasca trip, or whatever you want that helps you find your magic. but go and call it. who is stealing your magic?
roughly 15 years ago, an odd man at my gym approached me. I was used to odd people approaching me and I listened to what he had to say. he told me that he thought I might be interested in astrology and past lives. he was right. however, I found the notion of past lives to be not only scary, but crazy. he suggested I read Many Lives Many Masters by Brian L. Weiss, MD. I picked up the book. it made sense. I can’t explain how. but I felt at home. for once.
fast forward to my work with my own patients (I struggled with using the word patient, but it seems most fitting for the type of work that I do even though I am not a licensed MD – and, it is perfectly legal) and the Weiss book has become essential to opening them up to the same things that clicked for me. a wonderful modern-day extension to this book is Beyond Past Lives by Mira Kelley. I say “modern-day”, because she includes the notions of time and space, parallel realities and multiple dimensions. understanding the latter is CRUCIAL, in my opinion, as our planet itself moves through time and space into dimensions we were not familiar with several decades or even two decades ago (when Weiss wrote his book).
it has taken me years to warm up to the idea that past lives are a reality, not a hypothetical in my mind. now, in the outer world and especially in my sessions – and, in MY own life – past lives are EVIDENT often at first glance for me. it is mind-blowing. the last few sessions I have had were 100% centered around past-life trauma and remembrance. for example, one woman I saw — I saw right away her life in the 1950’s before she even made it to my door — she was a silver screen starlet, and I saw that she died tragically. I won’t go into details in case she is reading this and it is a trigger. but EVERYTHING I saw lined up, and everything she was experiencing simply helped me fill in the blanks of what I already saw. during the session, SHE began to see more of her past lives — around ME. she was scared, as my face seemed to change shape and I became very old and then very young. she saw my attire and could pinpoint the decade it was from. I saw what she was seeing and there was very little dialogue needed to validate what we both experienced. like I said, this has happened more than once (a lot more than once) and I have to make people feel safe while it happens – because hardly anyone in the “real world” talks about this stuff, and people think they are going nuts. or that I put something in their tea – lol! actually, one person said that she was afraid to drink the tea, and “did you put something in the tea? I promised myself I wouldn’t drink your tea!”. although funny, somehow I understood her paranoia. when someone begins to tap into other meridian lines of dimensional reality, it can feel like time-traveling while awake. I have an unintentional way of opening people to that which they are afraid to see or need to see. as was so in this session. I saw the thin veil between her past life and this life, where aspects of her soul were clinging to her, dragging her present and linear consciousness into old cycles that did not have closure. in a case like this, past life remembrance and regression is often the only way to fully heal – it is no different from blocking out a tragic memory in this life and having to recover it to recover FROM it. well, the difference is our linear perspective and limitations as 3d cognitive thinkers. so yes of course there is a difference from that perspective. but if we zoom way out, beyond the 3d confines (which we know are, indeed, confines), we can see the bigger picture – that there is no separation due to time and space. there is only the perceived separation between time and space.
this morning I woke up and I felt like I had spontaneously and suddenly moved past a deep pain I have experienced for the past two years around a past life in the 1960s/1970s in Los Angeles. the heartache associated with this remembrance left my body. the nostalgia is still here, and the memories continue to surface. but I don’t feel beholden to it, tragically sad or broken from this life. I can listen to Neil Young again no problem. HA.
the first time I landed in Los Angeles, many years ago, I began vomiting uncontrollably. at the time, I had no idea what that meant. during my stay, I felt like I was in an alternate universe. I didn’t have specific memories about what it was that I was releasing, but I did have deep emotions. I recently heard the same story from one of my patients. she had a visceral response to Los Angeles the first time she went…and the second…and the third. me too. I have a visceral response every time I go – because I am either letting go of or remembering another piece of my past life puzzle. or both. I have avoided visits for the past year while certain things gestate, knowing that I will return for work and meetings when I absolutely have to. and, I am excited to go. it just hasn’t been time. my skin has been too raw from the amount of information that bubbles up when I do go. and I know that the moment I land again in Los Angeles, something palpable will happen to me, to my now – current – outer life. it is just unavoidable.
an acquaintance of mine from about 10 years ago told me that one day she was walking down a paved road in NYC, and the street turned into cobblestone right before her eyes. she looked up and thought she saw a horse and buggy. she was a finance person and didn’t believe in any of this. it took her by surprise and she thought maybe she was hallucinating. she kept that experience to herself after telling me.
I have seen so many people heal after opening to the fact that their past lives are actually a real thing, and exploring such over time. when doctors or therapists can not explain certain conditions or feelings, there IS another route – and it has been proven, tried, and true for many.
the point of this brief post (I go deeper into past life discussion in other articles) is to remind those of us who can connect to the concept of past lives — even if only loosely — that they store a wealth of information, AND a wealth of healing potential if we are open. for some of us, like me, the veil between dimensions is extremely thin. if you are one of those people, it may serve you to access that which actually comes easier to you than most (whether you think it is crazy or not) – past life memory. I highly recommend the books by Weiss and Kelley. past lives are reality, not fantasy.
I can not stress this enough: there is the strongest correlation between someone’s healing process and their general, intrinsic, or practiced gratitude toward people and the world at large (NO MATTER HOW HARD THINGS HAVE BEEN FOR THEM) — I see this, without fail, through my sessions. I would love to put this into a case study.
if we do not naturally possess gratitude, and/or the ability to empathize with OTHERS (this is far different from being an “empath” – being an “empath” does not give us the right to selfishly blame the world for the way we feel), then we must LEARN IT – or we will always be in an uphill battle.
for decades, I was in contact with people who saw only the worst in me. I tried – over and over again – to prove that I was a good person. I always saw the best in others, and tried very hard to make sure that they saw the best in me.
then it began to dawn on me; what if I am a good person? and, if I am a good person, what does this say about those who only see the worst in me? I engaged in a multi-year battle within myself, seeking the “truth” behind this.
ego death is a funny thing. it happens at various times, in various stages, as we all have a kaleidoscope of ego that trained us in our survival. if I have been trained to see myself as flawed, as less than, as guilty etc, then my life actually depends upon that in every way possible – this is how abuse works and is able to perpetuate, of course. it was not until I began to access much of my conscious self that I began to learn my ego training was a sham. this was very difficult, because I was then forced to face the truth about others – it was almost more comfortable to continue believing lies about who I was.
it continued to dawn on me: if I always saw the best in people, then maybe I was a good person. perhaps my cognitive narrative was bullshit, and perhaps my core knew best – perhaps my desire to always see the best in others was not just some sort of Stockholm syndrome, perhaps it was a reflection of my inner, inherently good, self. then, I began to KNOW the truth about myself. and, there were/are still those who insisted/insist on seeing something completely opposite of me, about me: the projection of THEMSELVES. the only difference now is that I am no longer confused about this.
I once had a very close friend who always thought that people were scheming or plotting in some way. she dated schemey guys, and wondered why she kept attracting that “type”. her issue was not a defunct narrative provided to her by those who would have influenced her ego’s development, but rather her issue was confronting what actually resided/resides within her soul. SHE, was in fact, the calculating, dishonest schemer. with a fantastic sales career. and it took me years, due to my primitive cognitive training, to see the truth of who she was.
so you see, we have two things that happen; 1) ego/cognitive training that our survival depends upon, and 2) core truth about ourselves. we have to figure out what that dissonance is in ourselves, and in others.
this all might seem super obvious, but let me tell you: I see C-suites, doctors, lawyers and otherwise “successful” people who are in nonstop patterns of extreme psychological suffering and cognitive dissonance. why? because you can NOT beat the ego – until you beat the ego. this is not an educational or intelligence matter, but rather a consciousness matter. consciousness is a highway accessible to the soul – not to the bank account, not to the yogi “om-ing” themselves to death, not to the most prestigious educational institutions, and not to the otherwise privileged. it takes a LOT of work to WAKE UP.
it may be a tough one to digest, as it has most certainly been for me at times, but it is the truth: people don’t see you the way you are; they see you the way THEY are. be willing to let them inform you about who they are.
“you’re too nice” said the amazing woman who makes house calls to me for reiki and deep tissue massage. I was surprised to hear that, coming from such a lovely and – “nice” – woman like her. but that phrase is a phrase I hear a LOT.
but here is the thing: being “nice” allows the people around us to decide to hang themselves or not. “nice” is not my weakness, but rather my filter. last year I cut important ties (aka prison shackles of the mind, heart and spirit) with many people and things that were holding me back (understatement) — taking full advantage of how “nice” I am. I grew up learning to make myself small, have zero needs of my own, never think of myself first, feel 100% beholden to others, and to constantly self-blame. in fact, my life depended upon those things. so, one might say that I have had to figure out what part of me is “nice”, and what part of me was simply living in fear of what others might do if I were not so “nice”.
at this point in my life — and clearly this is how I am able to help so many people — I know the black and white difference between being “nice” and being weak. there is no more weakness left, as I no longer engage in relationships or patterns that mandate my weakness. and, the “nicer” I am, the more clearly I can see someone’s choices/intentions/actions – which means consistent weed-whacking of those around me who want to run away with that rope and jump off cliffs with it around their necks.
when we reach the point of understanding what parts of us are or were weak, and which parts of us are just inherently “nice”, we can discard the weak and allow the “nice” more than ever before – mostly because there will be no fear left inside of us as the weak has departed. “nice” is living in 100% vulnerability, a willingness that requires courage but sorts through bullshit in mere seconds. “nice” allows the people around us to reveal themselves at record pace.
bring it on, 2017: “nice” is actually winning. “nice” is not concerned with what anyone thinks. “nice” is thriving. “nice” is your filter, not your weakness.
that which does not align to our current level, awareness and integration of the truth is often further revealed or bumped out during stargate portals (and would certainly be highlighted during a direct planet sequence). it’s really not that complicated: the more “real” we want to become, the more pared down our outer (and inner, too) world becomes.
my life, personally, has shifted a dramatic 360 degrees (probably several times) over the last fiscal year alone. and I always get a bit more information on stargates. I am in the middle of yet another massive outer world change. how about you?
sharing dreams is a deeply sensitive matter. there is also something called the web of thought. have you ever shared a dream or desire with someone, only to notice that they somehow sucked the hot air right out of your balloon and your belief or inspiration subsequently fell flat to the ground?
this is because we can not share our dreams with everyone – at least not our sincerest dreams, and at least not when we are not 100% unbreakable or when we are energetically vulnerable in some way to those dreams not materializing. 50% of this boils down to WHO it is we are sharing with, and the other 50% of this boils down to how solid we are in our own knowing or self-confidence. but, going back to the point of this post…WHO we share our dreams with —
those who are not living a life which you DEEPLY ADMIRE are those who are out of alignment with where you are headed, and likely where you are at the present moment. perhaps they will have their own shifts and you can bond with them on dreams one day LATER. but perhaps also not. the reason it is important not to share your sincerest dreams aka ambitions with those who are not living a life which you admire, is because you are dealing with the law of physics – which states: two objects (or in this case, notions or ideas) MUST match in order to share space. what does this mean? it means that the higher vibrating object or DREAM, MUST match the other in order to share space. if we are engaging with someone who A) does not share the same level or degree of ambition, perception, imagination or possibility or B) has not transcended aspects of their life to actually LIVE in that space, we are then forced to MATCH whomever it is we are engaging with on THEIR level of said topic. again, it is irrelevant if they have “potential” – what we are dealing with is the NOW.
years ago I met a wonderful woman at a seminar. after the seminar, she approached me and said “I think you can help me”, as she had heard me speak briefly and give a young man some advice. what she meant by “help me”, I later discovered, was basically just be her friend and listen to her thoughts about her life – and truly nothing more! I had no idea whether I could “help her” at that time, because I didn’t know what she meant by that at that time; but when she handed me her business card, I saw that she was a dentist… well, for MONTHS, I had been writing down my intention to even out some of my stained teeth that were ravaged from braces etc. I was broker than broke, and I had no idea how I would ever afford such a thing. I had already appeared on television for some acting jobs back then, and I was self-conscious about my teeth in close-ups on camera. I had no idea what would come of my connection to this woman, but long story short she turned out to be an ANGEL.
this angel suggested that I come in for a cleaning. I was nervous as to how I would pay for it, as my dental coverage was crappy and I was again, broker than broke. not only did she flat-out refuse payment for the cleaning, but she actually offered — excuse me, INSISTED — that she cosmetically fix some of my stained teeth so that they all matched in color. I refused her offer a couple of times, but she kept insisting. now, having matching teeth was not a DREAM of mine, lol. but it was a strong desire. and, at the time, an insurmountable one. people/friends/acquaintances I had mentioned this desire to basically wrote it off and told me to just “be happy with what you have”. I remember calling my best friend at the time (a classic hot air balloon-popper, by the way) and telling her what this angel lady had offered me. she shot down the opportunity and insisted that this woman was scamming me or wanted something unmanageable from me and that I had better be careful / not take the “opportunity” (it took me some years to understand that this is the way SHE, my friend at the time, thought and calculated behind the scenes with nearly every interaction in her life – we were and are opposites in that way and many ways). I then suddenly felt bad and guilty about the prospect that this angel lady would be giving me several thousand dollars of gifted work, and I almost didn’t want it anymore. it almost ruined the offer for me. thankfully I ignored my friend and went in for the gift. it is, to date, the KINDEST thing anyone has ever done for me. and I love my teeth! it has also been great for on camera matters. this angel lady saw me for about 5 hours (the night before Thanksgiving, to boot) that year and went above and beyond with gifts of dental bliss. she gained absolutely NOTHING from it – except my appreciation. she didn’t even charge me for her time. after that experience, there was even more; she had taken me to dinner, to the spa, and she even house-sat for me and took care of my pets. this was/is a grown woman in her 40s and I don’t believe she had any romantic interest in me. this is the first “real” friend I met who showed me 100% unconditional love, and I remember it feeling extremely uncomfortable at the time as this was a completely new concept for me. I was used to giving it, but never receiving it. what a lesson about the dissonance between what I HAD BEEN used to and what I WOULD get used to with humans in my life.
I have had SO many dreams, and I continue to have them. I have shared many with many, and kept very few dreams to myself. when I have shared them with the “right” people (of which there have been so few), gasoline has been poured on a beautiful, raging fire, and I can feel my destiny rising up from within my root chakra. when I have shared them with the “wrong” people, I have felt anxious, insecure, and my fire has fallen flat to a barely-there smolder in my feet. the “right” people are the point of this #totd – these are people who either A) have the SAME level of desire, vision, hope and positivity, or B) have already achieved the “impossible” in life. the “impossible” would be the things that evvveeerrrryyyooonnneee around them said they were crazy for even thinking of! A) and B) people are ESSENTIAL to you when you have dreams. everyone else is POISON to you when you have dreams. remember the law of physics. also, just on a basic psychological level, how could we ever expect someone who lives OUT of the realm of possibility to support us? whether they are a “good” or “bad” person, it doesn’t really matter – someone living out of alignment with themselves, or in a sub par version of their own reality, will only drag you straight into their realm of “possibility” – big or small. we will always match that and whom which we engage with, period.
this “thought of the day” is turning out to be rather elaborate, but I would like to give more examples on sharing dreams, and how quickly we can be swayed toward doubt or possibility, depending on WHO is giving us feedback…
way back in the day, I was moving to NYC from a town just under an hour away. I knew that it was in NYC that my dreams would materialize, and nowhere else. I couldn’t explain it: I just knew. I remember sharing this insight with a family member, and it was as if I had dropped a bomb on their house – this person tried absolutely everything to prevent me from moving, and even suggested that I could have a television career from the small town where nothing happens (where I was living) versus NYC. over the course of a month or two, I had heard it all. one night as I was driving across a main highway, this person was screaming at me, at the top of their lungs, as to how could I EVER move to “the dirtiest, most disgusting, most dangerous city in the WORLD!”. I remember hysterically crying until I could not breathe, as they continued to do their damage. just writing about it gives me a major eye roll and head shake, as I have almost forgotten how insane yet typical that kind of an experience was for me with certain people. when they were done trying to block me from moving forward in any way, I hung up the phone and asked the Universe for a “sign” as I was still driving across the highway. a shooting star shot across the clear sky as I looked through my car dashboard. the next night, I was feeling a little doubtful after so much resistance from someone whom I had always asked for advice (looking back in this way, it is amazing to me that I ever did anything remotely special with my life). I was again driving across that main highway, coming home from the gym. I asked the Universe again for a sign, because I almost didn’t believe the one I had gotten the night before: another shooting star shot across the sky. I knew what I knew at that point, and nothing could stop me. I moved all of my belongings, by myself in a U-haul, on Christmas Day that year.
around the same time as the above example, perhaps just before it, actually, I was taking a class in the city (NYC). I would drive in and out in just under an hour. it was around this time that I met someone who I really admired. he was a successful and well-known actor/public figure, maybe 13 years older than me. we met one night at a nightclub as he followed me out and began asking me questions. I somehow had no idea who he was at the time (I’m not so good with faces, who is who, who is doing what, and this was also very pre social media era!), at least not until after we met for a glass or two of wine. during this date/meeting, he said to me, “what do you want?”. this seemed like a really intimidating question to a young 20-something girl and I can remember being really shy and feeling vulnerable. I don’t remember my response, but I do remember the next thing he said to me, with an absolutely piercing gaze, which was: “you are going to be very successful at whatever you decide to do. trust me, I just know”. his words cut deeply, and almost erased anything negating that had been said to me about who I was or what I desired – THAT is how strongly truth resonates within our body and energy field! when I went to my crappy finance job the next day, I googled him and that is how I found out who he “was”. although I believed him when he said to me what he said in person, I also later took note of the fact that the on-paper truths clearly indicated that he did, in fact, “know”. he did not try to get me into bed with him, he did not heavily pursue dating me (so we didn’t date), he was just perhaps another angel in my life. we lost contact for a while until about 2010, at which point we bumped into each other on the street in downtown NYC – we are still friends to this day.
when I finally first moved to NYC, I actually met with a psychic. it was the first psychic I ever had an experience with (I’m sad to say that she is no longer physically in existence). I was looking for guidance, support, positivity, or someone who “saw” me. well, she most certainly did. right when I sat down, she went straight into rattling off my deepest dreams and desires. I remember crying, because it felt like she was one of the first people who “saw” me. her truth connected so deeply with MY truth, that I felt forever changed. in just one hour, I had a new lease on life. this was only possible, because she was living in HER truth – i.e. the life of her sincerest dreams. I felt the support of the Universe running through me, and I also felt like I had “permission” to not only be happy, but go and actually DO the things I wanted to do. in just a year’s time, I moved mountains – all because someone saw my truth and did not feel threatened by it or my potential or imminent success in the outer world. that experience has had a lasting impact upon me to this day, and it is something I only hope occurs for the many people I work with in my private practice.
last example: a while back, I had a romantic interest. this interest was mutual and balanced on their end and on mine. things were progressing quite well, before getting serious or even physical. with excitement, I shared this connection/experience with a few people. one of them (and I certainly did not pay close enough attention to this) had never been in a positive – let alone healthy – relationship in her life. she dated married men and men who abused her. when I shared my experience, she SEEMED to be in a new and healthy relationship (and I later discovered how corrupt the relationship was, just like all of the others) and I felt “safe” sharing my desire. looking back, she was nodding with support and happiness for me, but inside she was triggered and resentful by her own inability to ever find a healthy or balanced relationship of her own. I am not joking, it was less than one week before my smoldering and igniting and exciting situation went absolutely flat. there were no logistical or logical reasons for it, and I felt it right before it went flat. in my gut, I felt there must have been a connection to the person I shared my experience with and the experience itself – and then, I was confirmed on that gut feeling. now, I do believe that what is “meant to happen” will indeed happen – but I ALSO know that a little thing called the WEB OF THOUGHT can come into play with many variables. no, I do not hold this person I speak of “responsible”, but I DO see the physics of thought and energy involved here. those who live in fear, control or panic are death wishes to our dreams. when we share something so bright, so vibrant, so precious with such a contrasting energy, the two fields will merge and the higher vibrating field will often be forced to match the lower denominator. it’s just not worth it. again, it is true that no one and no thing can steal our peace or our destiny, but they CAN certainly interfere with it – which is annoying, and a total waste of time. who wants more lessons in this arena? I don’t.
there are COUNTLESS other examples I could make note of here, but I want to drive this point home so loudly: share your dreams with those who have already done the remarkable, achieved the impossible, and most importantly those who do not negate, question or interfere in ANY WAY (especially “constructive criticism”, LOL, or “I’m just playing devil’s advocate…” people – BIG LOL, by the way) with your ambitions. pay attention to key stupid phrases such as “hopefully that works out for you” or “I’m glad to see that you have recovered from xyz trauma” or, perhaps my favorite “be careful” – these are either THEIR personal fears, OR criticisms veiled in shitblocks of “support”. I’m serious. before or during, at any point, in sharing your dreams with someone, pay close attention to how they interact with you, and change the subject entirely if necessary. you will feel it in your body, too, when someone is pretending to support you but feeling the opposite – get away, fast. this peters into the notion of the WEB OF THOUGHT, where all like-minded thoughts connect! unplug from it before it grows.
dream crushers not only do not believe in themselves (though they may appear to – on the outside – and there are ways to know the truth!), but they can not possibly believe in you or want what is best for you when they have no idea how to get it themselves. dream lifters, on the other hand, believe in the “impossible”, and most importantly in themselves – so they will have every reason to believe in and support you. why not play it safer? – remember: share your sincerest dreams only with those who live a life which you deeply admire.