sharing dreams is a deeply sensitive matter. there is also something called the web of thought. have you ever shared a dream or desire with someone, only to notice that they somehow sucked the hot air right out of your balloon and your belief or inspiration subsequently fell flat to the ground?
this is because we can not share our dreams with everyone – at least not our sincerest dreams, and at least not when we are not 100% unbreakable or when we are energetically vulnerable in some way to those dreams not materializing. 50% of this boils down to WHO it is we are sharing with, and the other 50% of this boils down to how solid we are in our own knowing or self-confidence. but, going back to the point of this post…WHO we share our dreams with —
those who are not living a life which you DEEPLY ADMIRE are those who are out of alignment with where you are headed, and likely where you are at the present moment. perhaps they will have their own shifts and you can bond with them on dreams one day LATER. but perhaps also not. the reason it is important not to share your sincerest dreams aka ambitions with those who are not living a life which you admire, is because you are dealing with the law of physics – which states: two objects (or in this case, notions or ideas) MUST match in order to share space. what does this mean? it means that the higher vibrating object or DREAM, MUST match the other in order to share space. if we are engaging with someone who A) does not share the same level or degree of ambition, perception, imagination or possibility or B) has not transcended aspects of their life to actually LIVE in that space, we are then forced to MATCH whomever it is we are engaging with on THEIR level of said topic. again, it is irrelevant if they have “potential” – what we are dealing with is the NOW.
years ago I met a wonderful woman at a seminar. after the seminar, she approached me and said “I think you can help me”, as she had heard me speak briefly and give a young man some advice. what she meant by “help me”, I later discovered, was basically just be her friend and listen to her thoughts about her life – and truly nothing more! I had no idea whether I could “help her” at that time, because I didn’t know what she meant by that at that time; but when she handed me her business card, I saw that she was a dentist… well, for MONTHS, I had been writing down my intention to even out some of my stained teeth that were ravaged from braces etc. I was broker than broke, and I had no idea how I would ever afford such a thing. I had already appeared on television for some acting jobs back then, and I was self-conscious about my teeth in close-ups on camera. I had no idea what would come of my connection to this woman, but long story short she turned out to be an ANGEL.
this angel suggested that I come in for a cleaning. I was nervous as to how I would pay for it, as my dental coverage was crappy and I was again, broker than broke. not only did she flat-out refuse payment for the cleaning, but she actually offered — excuse me, INSISTED — that she cosmetically fix some of my stained teeth so that they all matched in color. I refused her offer a couple of times, but she kept insisting. now, having matching teeth was not a DREAM of mine, lol. but it was a strong desire. and, at the time, an insurmountable one. people/friends/acquaintances I had mentioned this desire to basically wrote it off and told me to just “be happy with what you have”. I remember calling my best friend at the time (a classic hot air balloon-popper, by the way) and telling her what this angel lady had offered me. she shot down the opportunity and insisted that this woman was scamming me or wanted something unmanageable from me and that I had better be careful / not take the “opportunity” (it took me some years to understand that this is the way SHE, my friend at the time, thought and calculated behind the scenes with nearly every interaction in her life – we were and are opposites in that way and many ways). I then suddenly felt bad and guilty about the prospect that this angel lady would be giving me several thousand dollars of gifted work, and I almost didn’t want it anymore. it almost ruined the offer for me. thankfully I ignored my friend and went in for the gift. it is, to date, the KINDEST thing anyone has ever done for me. and I love my teeth! it has also been great for on camera matters. this angel lady saw me for about 5 hours (the night before Thanksgiving, to boot) that year and went above and beyond with gifts of dental bliss. she gained absolutely NOTHING from it – except my appreciation. she didn’t even charge me for her time. after that experience, there was even more; she had taken me to dinner, to the spa, and she even house-sat for me and took care of my pets. this was/is a grown woman in her 40s and I don’t believe she had any romantic interest in me. this is the first “real” friend I met who showed me 100% unconditional love, and I remember it feeling extremely uncomfortable at the time as this was a completely new concept for me. I was used to giving it, but never receiving it. what a lesson about the dissonance between what I HAD BEEN used to and what I WOULD get used to with humans in my life.
I have had SO many dreams, and I continue to have them. I have shared many with many, and kept very few dreams to myself. when I have shared them with the “right” people (of which there have been so few), gasoline has been poured on a beautiful, raging fire, and I can feel my destiny rising up from within my root chakra. when I have shared them with the “wrong” people, I have felt anxious, insecure, and my fire has fallen flat to a barely-there smolder in my feet. the “right” people are the point of this #totd – these are people who either A) have the SAME level of desire, vision, hope and positivity, or B) have already achieved the “impossible” in life. the “impossible” would be the things that evvveeerrrryyyooonnneee around them said they were crazy for even thinking of! A) and B) people are ESSENTIAL to you when you have dreams. everyone else is POISON to you when you have dreams. remember the law of physics. also, just on a basic psychological level, how could we ever expect someone who lives OUT of the realm of possibility to support us? whether they are a “good” or “bad” person, it doesn’t really matter – someone living out of alignment with themselves, or in a sub par version of their own reality, will only drag you straight into their realm of “possibility” – big or small. we will always match that and whom which we engage with, period.
this “thought of the day” is turning out to be rather elaborate, but I would like to give more examples on sharing dreams, and how quickly we can be swayed toward doubt or possibility, depending on WHO is giving us feedback…
way back in the day, I was moving to NYC from a town just under an hour away. I knew that it was in NYC that my dreams would materialize, and nowhere else. I couldn’t explain it: I just knew. I remember sharing this insight with a family member, and it was as if I had dropped a bomb on their house – this person tried absolutely everything to prevent me from moving, and even suggested that I could have a television career from the small town where nothing happens (where I was living) versus NYC. over the course of a month or two, I had heard it all. one night as I was driving across a main highway, this person was screaming at me, at the top of their lungs, as to how could I EVER move to “the dirtiest, most disgusting, most dangerous city in the WORLD!”. I remember hysterically crying until I could not breathe, as they continued to do their damage. just writing about it gives me a major eye roll and head shake, as I have almost forgotten how insane yet typical that kind of an experience was for me with certain people. when they were done trying to block me from moving forward in any way, I hung up the phone and asked the Universe for a “sign” as I was still driving across the highway. a shooting star shot across the clear sky as I looked through my car dashboard. the next night, I was feeling a little doubtful after so much resistance from someone whom I had always asked for advice (looking back in this way, it is amazing to me that I ever did anything remotely special with my life). I was again driving across that main highway, coming home from the gym. I asked the Universe again for a sign, because I almost didn’t believe the one I had gotten the night before: another shooting star shot across the sky. I knew what I knew at that point, and nothing could stop me. I moved all of my belongings, by myself in a U-haul, on Christmas Day that year.
around the same time as the above example, perhaps just before it, actually, I was taking a class in the city (NYC). I would drive in and out in just under an hour. it was around this time that I met someone who I really admired. he was a successful and well-known actor/public figure, maybe 13 years older than me. we met one night at a nightclub as he followed me out and began asking me questions. I somehow had no idea who he was at the time (I’m not so good with faces, who is who, who is doing what, and this was also very pre social media era!), at least not until after we met for a glass or two of wine. during this date/meeting, he said to me, “what do you want?”. this seemed like a really intimidating question to a young 20-something girl and I can remember being really shy and feeling vulnerable. I don’t remember my response, but I do remember the next thing he said to me, with an absolutely piercing gaze, which was: “you are going to be very successful at whatever you decide to do. trust me, I just know”. his words cut deeply, and almost erased anything negating that had been said to me about who I was or what I desired – THAT is how strongly truth resonates within our body and energy field! when I went to my crappy finance job the next day, I googled him and that is how I found out who he “was”. although I believed him when he said to me what he said in person, I also later took note of the fact that the on-paper truths clearly indicated that he did, in fact, “know”. he did not try to get me into bed with him, he did not heavily pursue dating me (so we didn’t date), he was just perhaps another angel in my life. we lost contact for a while until about 2010, at which point we bumped into each other on the street in downtown NYC – we are still friends to this day.
when I finally first moved to NYC, I actually met with a psychic. it was the first psychic I ever had an experience with (I’m sad to say that she is no longer physically in existence). I was looking for guidance, support, positivity, or someone who “saw” me. well, she most certainly did. right when I sat down, she went straight into rattling off my deepest dreams and desires. I remember crying, because it felt like she was one of the first people who “saw” me. her truth connected so deeply with MY truth, that I felt forever changed. in just one hour, I had a new lease on life. this was only possible, because she was living in HER truth – i.e. the life of her sincerest dreams. I felt the support of the Universe running through me, and I also felt like I had “permission” to not only be happy, but go and actually DO the things I wanted to do. in just a year’s time, I moved mountains – all because someone saw my truth and did not feel threatened by it or my potential or imminent success in the outer world. that experience has had a lasting impact upon me to this day, and it is something I only hope occurs for the many people I work with in my private practice.
last example: a while back, I had a romantic interest. this interest was mutual and balanced on their end and on mine. things were progressing quite well, before getting serious or even physical. with excitement, I shared this connection/experience with a few people. one of them (and I certainly did not pay close enough attention to this) had never been in a positive – let alone healthy – relationship in her life. she dated married men and men who abused her. when I shared my experience, she SEEMED to be in a new and healthy relationship (and I later discovered how corrupt the relationship was, just like all of the others) and I felt “safe” sharing my desire. looking back, she was nodding with support and happiness for me, but inside she was triggered and resentful by her own inability to ever find a healthy or balanced relationship of her own. I am not joking, it was less than one week before my smoldering and igniting and exciting situation went absolutely flat. there were no logistical or logical reasons for it, and I felt it right before it went flat. in my gut, I felt there must have been a connection to the person I shared my experience with and the experience itself – and then, I was confirmed on that gut feeling. now, I do believe that what is “meant to happen” will indeed happen – but I ALSO know that a little thing called the WEB OF THOUGHT can come into play with many variables. no, I do not hold this person I speak of “responsible”, but I DO see the physics of thought and energy involved here. those who live in fear, control or panic are death wishes to our dreams. when we share something so bright, so vibrant, so precious with such a contrasting energy, the two fields will merge and the higher vibrating field will often be forced to match the lower denominator. it’s just not worth it. again, it is true that no one and no thing can steal our peace or our destiny, but they CAN certainly interfere with it – which is annoying, and a total waste of time. who wants more lessons in this arena? I don’t.
there are COUNTLESS other examples I could make note of here, but I want to drive this point home so loudly: share your dreams with those who have already done the remarkable, achieved the impossible, and most importantly those who do not negate, question or interfere in ANY WAY (especially “constructive criticism”, LOL, or “I’m just playing devil’s advocate…” people – BIG LOL, by the way) with your ambitions. pay attention to key stupid phrases such as “hopefully that works out for you” or “I’m glad to see that you have recovered from xyz trauma” or, perhaps my favorite “be careful” – these are either THEIR personal fears, OR criticisms veiled in shitblocks of “support”. I’m serious. before or during, at any point, in sharing your dreams with someone, pay close attention to how they interact with you, and change the subject entirely if necessary. you will feel it in your body, too, when someone is pretending to support you but feeling the opposite – get away, fast. this peters into the notion of the WEB OF THOUGHT, where all like-minded thoughts connect! unplug from it before it grows.
dream crushers not only do not believe in themselves (though they may appear to – on the outside – and there are ways to know the truth!), but they can not possibly believe in you or want what is best for you when they have no idea how to get it themselves. dream lifters, on the other hand, believe in the “impossible”, and most importantly in themselves – so they will have every reason to believe in and support you. why not play it safer? – remember: share your sincerest dreams only with those who live a life which you deeply admire.