we are not attacked because we are flawed; we are attacked because we are brilliant. do you often receive a polarized response from the humans you encounter? if so, they are responding to your light – not the absence of it. learn about the physics behind human behavior
this eBooklet is also what is considered a “transmission”, or, as I like to refer to it, a “download”. each letter has a numerical quality to it – each word has a numerical quality to it – and each eBooklet has a numerical quality to it; numerical qualities resonate at a particular frequency. frequency is the transmission of energy from one 3d body to another by way of an intangible dimension. as words elicit emotions which are frequencies in and of themselves, so do letters/words/writings elicit, transmit and download individual and collective frequencies. each eBooklet published by this author offers a download which serves to illuminate both truth and love (which are one in the same). it is suggested that each download be experienced in a relaxed, grounded physical and psychological state (or as relaxed and grounded as possible). please enjoy each download as one would enjoy his favorite tea, tobacco, song, or … you get the idea.
© Healing Elaine®, 2016
ever since I could remember, since the day I was born, I was a target. a scapegoat. a whipping boy. (read the definition of whipping boy!). I knew no different and it carried on throughout my entire life. for years, I carried the burden of believing that there was something inherently wrong or flawed with me. so, I settled. a lot. I settled in friendships, I settled in relationships, I settled in all aspects of my life. I never felt comfortable with my “peers” and was often outcasted. or paradoxically, very admired. but often outcasted, betrayed, and bullied – even by those I befriended when no one else wanted to have anything to do with them. I always felt the outsider.
as the years went by, in my late teens and early 20s, I lived on my own and began to meet people who I did not feel the outsider with. now, at the time, this didn’t make a whole lot of sense to me. because on paper, I had nothing to offer them. the people whom I felt I didn’t have to do anything other than breathe around to be accepted happened to be super accomplished individuals. famous athletes, singers, public figures of all sorts. men, women, young and old. for some ODD reason (or so I thought), I could be in a crowd of 100,000 people and these people and I would make eye contact and talk. like we knew each other forever. this felt extremely odd to me. because, if I could not fit in with my “peers” and struggled my entire life to feel “normal”, why were these very over-the-top individuals so EASY to be around? I felt normal – accepted – uplifted by their energy. I battled understanding:
A) why I kept drawing these people in
B) whether this was this simply my ego, excited to spend time with well-known people
C) why nearly all insecurity went out the window when I was with them
there was a drastic difference in the way I felt physiologically around “these” folks versus the ones I was “supposed” to fit in with. now, it is not to say that the ONLY folks I felt “normal” around were of this public figure variety. not at all. but there was a common denominator amongst the ones I met and how at ease I felt, every single time. I began to journal about these experiences to understand what was happening. as I spent time with these individuals, I understood that they, too, often felt like pariahs their entire lives! some of them didn’t get as much “hate” as I seemed to get (mostly because they had different early childhood experiences than me), and some of them had very supportive and “easy” family lives, but their soul existed regardless in a longing-for-more state. no matter how many fans or the public support they received, they still felt “different”. and there were often holes in their hearts. nothing could make up for this feeling different or “other”, or take it away. now: what they were indeed experiencing was a massive variance between their energy/frequency preset point and that of the collective norm/others. that variance created the feeling of contrast, hence the perception of extreme separation. these people living in said contrast that only physics and hypotheses could explain, were what I later considered to be “outliers”…with that, like all things, came both blessings and curses.