Sharon’s Video Testimonial for Healing Elaine®

I am so grateful to get to work with people of such inner-caliber. working with Sharon was a treasure, and I really appreciate her video testimonial. I haven’t posted every Healing Elaine® video out there to my blog, so feel free to visit my YouTube channel and subscribe for updates there. in addition, the subscription box for my blog is back on the home page of this here website, if you would like to subscribe to blog updates.

every session or otherwise Healing Elaine® related experience is different (including my TEM® and PE™ offerings), and everyone processes them differently, but the bottom line is resounding gut level connectivity – for both/all parties. I believe that there is someone for everyone. so, even if you never see me, perhaps some of my videos will open you to the thought that you have someone out there who you can and will connect to and who will perhaps open a window in your mind’s eye. we never walk this journey alone, even if the other people walking alongside us we will never meet; we are still walking beside many people who think and feel as we do. and it may help to know just that as you go about your day/week/life.

FRIENDLY DISCLAIMER: Healing Elaine® / Elaine is a Reiki Practitioner and Ordained Minister, but is not a physician, dietitian, nutritionist, or psychotherapist. Her advice, workshops, written content, and healing sessions are considered supplementary in nature and should not be a replacement for conventional medicine or psychiatric care. Please consult your physician or other licensed healthcare professional for any physical or psychological ailments you may be suffering or think you may have. By attending any seminar, class or session provided by Healing Elaine® / Elaine, you acknowledge that in no event will (Healing Elaine® / Elaine) be liable in any way directly or indirectly for damages resulting from information, data, classes or healing sessions provided or for the loss of profits through the use or misuse of said information and data, either via its use, negligence or other actions.

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rejection is protection, part Infinity

photo by Anita Saini

I’ve addressed this topic more times than I can recall; in my blog, in sessions, in countless conversations with all kinds of (amazing) people — rejection is protection, always, in every case. it just depends upon our ability to perceive the protection dynamic…

for starters, I understand first-hand what it means to be my own worst enemy and take things personally when it comes to being “rejected”. I might venture to say that, many times in the past, I created rejection scenarios to impose upon myself when they didn’t really exist to begin with. what created those scenarios was my interpretation of events. in order to understand my interpretation, read this blog from the beginning and you will find countless self-share examples that explain my experiences and subsequent wiring that had to be altered in order to live out who I AM. instead of who I am NOT…

I understand how the brain protects itself — by interpreting rejection as actual rejection when it is not such — in order to “keep the entire body and brain alive” by repeating patterns that at one point DID ensure survival. but what happens when we move closer to detaching from the once-necessary pessimism that literally kept us alive? well what happens is, we encounter “rejection” to the MAXIMUM…to kill off a dead-end belief or entire belief system. in this space, we are challenged with the ultimate rejections, and in many cases, a series of rejections. they feel real. they don’t feel like protection. they ARE protection. every time…

the very fact that we can not perceive the beauty of rejection as a metaphor for incredible and divine protection is evidence that our self-image needs to change. we ALL face (perceived) rejection. each and every one of us. it’s what tethers us to unhealthy patterns that we repeat in business, home, social, and beyond. if we dare look beneath the pattern, which many of us simply will never do, we find our deepest fear and ASSOCIATION with what we consider to be “rejection”. and when we get closer to unhinging – or rather our soul declares we must unhinge – a belief that is holding us hostage to a past situation, we attract “rejection” aka protection to the most ultimate extreme. it is in the sheer seeming ABSURDITY of said “rejection” that is our first and main indicator that perhaps…we are being protected.

as we get closer to ending a pattern, rejection will accumulate to such a degree that we are so humbled that there is just no more fighting it. we almost do not care about the feelings we once associated with the perceived rejection, because we are bowled over with the absurdity of such. have you ever been in a position in life in which the only available remaining response to your position was laughter? no matter how life-threatening, how dire, how horrendous — laughter was the only option because it felt like a big joke and there is no way that God could be that cruel? this is the turning point of recognizing rejection as actual protection. and it is in this space that we actually RISK changing our mind about what is happening. because, we are the common denominator…and, what if there is something “right” about us, that is at play here?

what is “right” about us will scare off the demons. literally. demons might present THROUGH others, and their actions, versus actually BE others. it’s important to recognize that someone’s behavior is not necessarily who they are, but that it is indeed either helping us or killing us with little room for negotiation between the two motives. and in that behavior, we may struggle to negotiate or understand their conscious intention versus their unconscious intention…creating illusion around the core point of our experience with another person or situation because INTELLECT is separate from the unconscious mind. what is “RIGHT” about us will seem to completely be honored by intangible forces in a particular situation yet COUNTERED by the logic of it. that means that, “this makes no sense!!!!! I can’t get my head around it!!!!”, but this also means that, “there is something so strong, too strong, too repetitive and loud about what is happening here, I must consider trusting it”…

what is “right” about us will exaggerate the experiences that we have with others that would be considered “rejection” experiences…to the point in which we actually turn the page and risk seeing the truth: that we are being protected.

I’ve had this conversation more in the past 9 months than ever before in my life. my personal life presented SO MANY experiences over the past fiscal year that appeared DAUNTING — I felt that I was absolutely being rejected by the entire Universe, as well as specific individuals who did not honor or respect me. some of these people I had looked up to as semi-guides, helpers, friends, — those I thought would be along for the ride with me for life with regard to my work and soul’s purpose. I was wrong — or rather, God did NOT want me to ride with certain people anymore. and it wasn’t just people. it was ALL KINDS of situations in life in general that had expired. doors were slamming and locking in my face. and as much as I know, and have been through on this front already many times over in the past, one can never be prepared for their entire life to change for the better…because all of the swampness comes up and OUT before it does. we see it leave. we watch and feel it leave. we grieve it. and we assign it unfortunate meaning, until we do not assign it that meaning.

in the past fiscal year I’ve faced more difficulty than ever before in my life, with “rejection” — aka PROTECTION. as I’ve had many rounds with this notion already, I did KNOW what was happening. however, at a pinnacle moment around the fall of last year, I briefly lost sight of the positive aspects of protection that were being sent my way by dismantling ALL KINDS OF THINGS AND RELATIONSHIPS. it had reached comedic proportions. the literal front door of my apartment building LOCKED ME IN one night — as in, the door lock broke, locked me in, and there was no out. although I was experiencing one of the most difficult periods of my life, I marveled at the symbolism gifted to my by the Universe: I was being PROTECTED. the Universe said “you may not walk through this door again”. and so, as life does, I experienced the ultimate forms of protection in all kinds of ways: bad behaviors from others, screw-overs, broken trust, disappointments, and shocking loss. and at the end of it? I emerged as a different person. because I had no choice left but to understand this, again, as PROTECTION. at the peak of my brokenness, I wrote this post on betrayal and it still resonates in my gut when I re-read it.

this morning I had two conversations with AMAZING WOMEN who are recently climbing out of “rejection” and now able to see it as PROTECTION. as I always say: NOT ALL ENERGY IS EQUAL. it doesn’t matter what something looks like: we know not what resides underneath that 3D surface. there are all kinds of amazing reasons for all kinds of terrible things. and in my conversations today I was reminded double-time as to why I went through some of the very most ridiculous shit of my life last fall and winter. it was fodder to help those also on the crux of that exact precipice. it was to ensure: not only am I better, lighter, happier as a result of my “rejections”, but I am GROUNDED as hell and literally not the same person I was 9 months ago. doors that did not serve me, in all forms, were closed FOR me. there comes a point in time in which we must CHOOSE how to view these disappointments versus think we can intellectualize why things happen…this is the human trap — figuring it all out instead of LIVING IT ALL OUT.

I find that the most INCREDIBLE people I know have gone through the most incredible “rejection” aka protection to land where they are (in great places that many people covet). the hazing associated with understanding how to interpret rejection as protection is legit. and it is reserved for the few who are able to shift their consciousness, move out of victim consciousness, and literally choose a new life. a lot happens before we can perceive rejection as protection — a lot happens on internal psycho-emotional levels. and you can read about that process in other posts of mine, scattered throughout this entire blog. but I wanted to share today, AGAIN, about the raw fact surrounding “rejection”: IT NEVER IS.

recently I’ve had a ton of type A people aggressively approach me because they see things that they think they “want” or can “take” (see my eBooklet 3 – what they really want is intangible, they just have not figured that out yet!) — and I already know the drill. I know that they are going to come at me hard and fast, pitch me a sales pitch to convince me that I should do xyz (so that they can benefit, only it’s presented as a mutual benefit), and then find out that they CAN’T actually get xyz thing…because you can’t absorb or steal someone else’s consciousness. and in each of these encounters, they run away when they can’t find the “benefit” for themselves…mostly because they are not sure what they are running toward in the first place. they see a shiny penny and they aren’t sure how that penny shines, but they want/think they can glean the secret formula. these types of people always see the outside of me/my work, and never the inside of me/my work. these are not patients of mine, these are real-world folks. all the ones who think strategically but NOT intuitively and believe that they can monetize me…except they have no understanding of what is being monetized — clearly, that is where *I* come in and how I get paid. it’s not a trinket I can sell to someone. and in all of the many situations I’ve experienced with others who thought they could cherry-pick off my tree for free and actually gain something, I’ve had the choice in each instance as to how to perceive what’s happened. as typically what happens when someone realizes they can’t get something for free, they depart. departure can feel like abandonment or rejection. it’s not. it’s protection from people who do not have best interests in mind because they don’t understand a certain energy. and my default is now set to the point, thanks to having gone through this in SO many categories of life, of absolutely bypassing any emotion or internalized personalization of what’s occurred. it’s never rejection anymore. I never feel bad about it. it’s always protection. and when we have something unique, something important, it’s “of course” that not every random Joe off the street can or should understand our commodity. in this sense, we are being protected from wasting time, energy, and so on. and I am grateful to be in a place where there feels absolutely nothing “personal” about this and is certainly not even close to rejection in my interpretation. I see it a mile away, watch it play out, and smile at how it has not a shred of “rejection” essence to touch within me. it just doesn’t exist in me anymore. this is a 180 from how my life began and how I continued it for years out of “survival” and outdated agreements with my mind-adrenaline.

allow people to disappoint you. screw you over. hurt you. offend you. steal from you. THEY ARE IN YOUR LIFE TO SHOW YOU WHAT YOU ARE NOT, if only you can stop committing to what they symbolize for you. what they take away with them, is your old wounds. it takes a full magnet of darkness (that person or situation) to pull out the fragmented marbleized darkness hanging out within your psychological, emotional and physical astral/spheres. when the fragments that have been assigned to you by others who have nothing to do with your path are removed by others who also have nothing to do with your path, you can understand protection. this is where the ultimate freedom, and even unconditional love for all things, exists.

rejection is protection. always. you’re better than you think. probably an anomaly. a Unicorn. a treasure. in that sense why WOULD the world understand you right off the bat? you’re being asked to understand the WORLD. allow yourself to be assassinated in all kinds of ways in order to re-discover, or discover for the first time, who you actually are. protected.


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this full moon today. plus, Venus retrograde, multiple dark nights of the soul, and general HE® updates


photo by Nadia Itani

as I type this post, Don Henley’s “In A New York Minute” has just come on. if you don’t already know, I tend to channel-write whilst listening to particular hit decade channels on spotify. and if you don’t know this song, read the lyrics. it sums up a lot, much pertaining to this post.

as I look back on my life, and as I’ve elaborated on in my eBooklet1, I have had a series of dark nights of the soul. the majority of my early years on this planet were a dark night no doubt. like one, long, and grey memory, it was marked with my wailing for God to please rescue me. I know that sounds depressing. and it was. much of my life I spent trapped in all ways – mentally, emotionally, physically and spiritually. as I hid in tight places in the home I grew up in, or in the basement of the church I went to, I would pray to disappear. I would hold my breath so much that I would get dizzy. though I was never suicidal, I would have done ANYTHING to escape my reality. I wasn’t designed to be mentally ill, for better or for worse, so I did not become schizophrenic or dissociative. I believe 100% that this was so I could do the work I am doing now, in a particular way.

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the physical death of a person, and their effect upon us afterward


photo by Pia Oyarzun

as far back as I can remember, I sensed energies. I did not know I was sensing energies. when I was 3, I got up in the middle of the night to use the bathroom. when I put my tiny hand on my bedroom door knob to turn it, another hand placed itself over mine. I jumped back into bed and peed myself.

when I was old enough to be left home alone, I heard people in the house. I called 911 many times when I was left alone. there was never anyone there, but I was sure that someone was breaking and entering. they never did, at least not while I was there. I didn’t believe in ghosts, I wasn’t raised on ghosts, and I didn’t know anyone who did believe in ghosts. I dismissed my senses and decided to trust myself a bit less. there were plenty of other reasons I did not trust myself, either, but sensing people in the house who were not there was prominently on that list. and yet, I kept reacting to the noises, the feeling, the cold, the knowing — I continued calling the police well into my teens, because I heard someone in the house.

when I started to become super social in my mid teens around 15 in particular, my “awareness” died down. I had also become more astute at shutting down, because it was too scary to be in my body for a host of other, very real, physical and psychological reasons. so, after a certain point, I didn’t really think about my sensing of people who ended up not…being there.

by my late teens, I didn’t know anyone who had died. when my paternal grandfather died when I was 21, it was the first person who I had known in the flesh. as he was dying, I somehow knew about karma and closure, and I decided to write him a note of closure as he ended his life. I didn’t know him very well and barely saw him. yet I felt it was important to help him through to “the other side”. one year later, I was visiting my grandma, his widow. she and I always had a special connection. the first memory I have of her is when I was 3 or 4. we were walking up the stairs to go to a swimming pool and I turned around, looked at her, and said “I like you”. she said to me “I like you too”. we shared a special connection and still do — living, dead, and anywhere in between. though neither she nor my grandfather was religious, she and I shared a special human and psychic connection. that will never die. so when her husband died, I was curious about if/how/when he would “show up” and visit us. mind you, I had never seen (to my knowledge!) a ghost, and I didn’t expect to be visited by him or anyone else. one night, about a year after his death, I was staying the night at their house in Florida. I have always had trouble sleeping — for reasons I am very aware of. mostly traumatic reasons. my experience with sleep involved, over and over again as a child, waking to pure trauma and horrific fear of a variety of instances. therefore, my ability to 1) fall asleep 2) stay asleep 3) not be afraid of going to sleep was weak. anyhow, I was staying in the room that he died in one night. in the bed that he died in. which I didn’t connect to at the time. as I rifled through the medicine cabinet in his bathroom, I found percocets that were prescribed to him to ease his pain as he was dying. let me be clear: I have never had an addiction to anything. I have never relied on substances. I consider myself extremely fortunate to be able to pick up any substance and put it right down when my mind decides I do not need it. while I have other challenges, substances is not one of them. and yet as we know, substance issues mimic other issues generated by the mind, so my compassion and understanding has repeatedly connected to those who have or have had substance issues and addiction. I digress with that side note, but I want to paint the fullest picture possible. like most nights of my life, I had no idea whether I would be able to fall or stay asleep — so when there was something overtly available to take to aid me in the process, I would take it (I never purchased or was prescribed sleep prescriptions or drugs in my teens or 20s). the percocets were available and not only that, clearly no one was using them anymore. my grandma still hadn’t had the heart to clean out his bathroom (they had separate bathrooms and bedrooms). I took one percocet to sleep, and put another one in my pocket “for the road”. I left the rest in the bottle. I put the bottle back and felt guilty about it, even though he was dead. I went to sleep peacefully because of the extreme high I got from the medication…

in the middle of the night, I was awoken suddenly. as I looked directly in front of me, where there was no headboard, a face began taking shape — like a tv screen coming into focus. my grandfather’s face formed before my eyes, and I was frozen. his hands went into prayer in front of his face, and I was in shock. I pinched my own arm as hard as I could to prove to myself in the morning that this was not a dream. I prayed and prayed to fall asleep and held my breath (a skill I tried to master as child with the covers pulled up tightly around my body and face when I was afraid) and I finally did. in the morning, I put the pill that I had taken back in his pill bottle and I apologized to him. I felt guilty. in retrospect, I realize I was coming up on increasingly challenging years in my life, and he knew it — he was never a man of prayer, blatantly did not believe in God or religion, and yet there he was. praying for me. clear as day.

this was the first experience that I had with a “ghost”. I say “ghost” because it was after that, that I realized how palpable his intention was for me. I could feel, telepathically, that he was afraid for my safety in general. I was definitely a fly-by-the-seat girl at the time, and I never thought about the consequences of my actions. I traveled solo, often didn’t know my next move, stayed out late and drank a lot, and insisted on being only in the present tense at all times. I unwittingly put myself in dangerous situations often. I never knew they were dangerous. I was too accustomed to the feeling. and I had a thirst to understand the world.

after my experience with my late grandfather, I did not have another one like it with him or anyone else for a long time. however actually, I did not understand that I was indeed having them ALL of the time — with energy. as you will read about in my other posts, energy is INFINITE. it transcends physical form, and takes many forms of consciousness (as well as light and dark — and intangible darkness often seeks tangible containers at all costs — this is another subject entirely). positive consciousness is hindered in physical form, and it raises beyond physical form. then, when we work on ourselves as human beings, we can access it. this is the bridge that we create and experience between 3d and 5d. that is also another post, though.

in my mid and late 20s, I became acutely interested in my own spirituality and personal consciousness. I went to alanon meetings, read tons of self help books (since a child, actually), therapist hopped (what a disappointing scene in general), and did anything I could to hear my own voice. one day, after I let go of a stagnant relationship which almost lead to marriage, I simply asked my “spirit guides” to please show themselves. I was detached from the outcome. but as I asked them aloud to show themselves, an entire veil of mist or, it can be best described as heat coming off of the pavement on a hot day, manifested in front of me. it was about 5 feet tall and I couldn’t believe it. I also couldn’t believe that “it” showed up on demand. to be sure I wasn’t crazy, I looked at my cat who was on the other side of this energy — his eyes were huge and he was scanning it up and down. the feeling that took over me when this energy/guide showed up was pure love. there is no other way to put it. I felt…like I would never feel alone again. I felt safe and guided. this was a pivotal point for me. unconditional love touched my heart in that moment and it was the first time I felt anything like it.

as I developed my understanding of many things unseen, in my late 20s, I began to realize that the people I “imagined” breaking into my house or walking around it when I was a child were…real. they just were not in physical form. I felt them all of the time. I also saw rather uncouth energies at the home of another family member every single time I stayed there. the only word I can use to describe those energies is: evil. I hated staying there. I had nightmares each time, visions of the “devil”, and general feelings of darkness. it didn’t make sense to me until way later as to…why. the energy behind the scenes supported everything I felt. this is when I realized that NOTHING goes unnoticed in life. we just lie to ourselves to feel safe.

my next experience with the unseen and the death of a person I knew was with a grandmother (not the widow). as I sat by my window in my east village apartment, I was suddenly overcome with nausea. it felt disgusting, and I tasted medication. I barely made it 10 feet to my bed and curled myself up into the fetal position. I don’t know for how long I napped, but I was awoken to the sounds of sobs of despair and mourning. it was so loud, I thought my neighbors were wailing with tears. my body felt so sick, as if something was passing through it. and I just knew instantly: my grandmother who had cancer had just died. I had no way of knowing this for fact, other than my experience. when I went over to my cell phone, there was a message waiting for me indicating that yes indeed, she died. it was then, that I began to learn that I was and am used as a gatekeeper. fast forward, and this began happening for me with patients who were about to lose parents or loved ones or even acquaintances. for whatever reason, my physical field was used as a gate to some other…place.

as noted, growing up I never believed in ghosts and if you told me in college that I was a gatekeeper or that something like a gatekeeper was real, I would have run away from you. I can’t stress this enough, because I am not a naturally woo-woo person. this is what makes everything that much more valid for me; I have never sought out my experiences. they have taken over me, though. and now I am perfectly fine with this (most of the time! except for when I feel someone elses emotions so strongly that I can not shake them — hence my session work and protocol).

after I saw my grandfather those years ago, I really did not want to see another “ghost” so clearly. I understood that yes, energy is infinite and timeless, and I even understood how the human ego leaves us when we die, but I still wasn’t comfortable or welcoming to that which I could not…control. but after I was used as some kind of gate or portal not only for those dying and changing form, and then for thousands of sessions, I sort of…got used to it. one day I woke up in my bedroom and saw a man from the 1980s in a blue and white track suit. he was Italian. I saw that he was busy..doing stuff. counting money, I think. he shared my living space — it’s just that we were in different dimensions. he was not aware of me — he was purely going about his business. I was aware of him. and as I began to study him, he…evaporated.

another morning I woke up and saw an old man and a little girl — his granddaughter, I think. they were dressed in 1920s clothing. he looked at me as if he knew I was occupying his space, and they disappeared into another dimension completely. I felt…safe and not alone, ironically. I no longer felt the crippling fear that I felt as a child. I will also note that there were so many other difficult things happening during that early time in my life, that it would have been very hard to decipher what was real since I was conditioned to not believe ANYTHING that I knew to be true, one way or another. thankfully, over time and with courage and effort, we can recover memories and our own sense of judgement, as well as, well, TRUTH…

now, to the reason I am writing this post. we all know someone who has died. most of us have loved ones who have died. and we miss them terribly. and we wonder “where they are”. some of us never wonder, because we feel them all of the time. and this is what I want to say…you may have heard or read or experienced that the essence of a person who once “was”, never leaves. and this is partly true. what DOES leave, is their ego. and this is when karma in a family dynamic can REALLY kick up — because there is no physical container blocking, unwittingly holding or defending, or otherwise countering truth. there is truth in all relationships, whether they are friendships or family or acquaintanceships. when someone dies, all of the ego aspects of them are what leave. we are then left with their intangible resonance and consciousness, aka…truth. unthwarted and unblocked from human conditions: control, manipulation, greed, etc.

often when someone dies we see family “battles” over petty shit like money. people actually spend time trying to go against wishes of deceased loved ones, or get more than their share, or even worse, still try to control the person from beyond their grave. the interesting thing about these battles is that since the ego of the person of focus is gone, the truth often envelopes everyone around them in a crazy way. this is why many people go nuts over wills, assets, and so forth. even when the wishes of a deceased person are crystal clear. emotions like control and fear and greed take over, and the people who were close to the deceased person seem to…lose it. they lose it, because there is no longer a container for all of the emotions they repressed while the now-deceased person was alive. when this space is no longer there to contain the ugly human emotions of others, from many years or timelines, we are left with: truth.

last week someone told me an interesting story about a will. and I am making a point here regarding how powerful the intention and truth of a person who has left this tangible plane and now resides solely in consciousness, versus unconsciousness, which was not a possible residence while they were in physical form, is. a wicked old lady who I actually randomly knew via one degree of separation, lost her mother. while the mother was alive, this wicked lady did everything she could to convince her sick and dying mother to change her will. the wicked lady had one sister. the sister was not wicked. the mother, alive in physical form, was still in ego, and confused by the wicked nature of the wicked old lady (her daughter). well, one day this wicked lady was caught doing something not above board with money. upon a coinciding death of her mother right around that same time, it was as if karma was nearly in physical form and laughing: somehow, it worked out that the wicked lady’s sister — the one who was not wicked — received ALL of the inheritance. not part of it. but all of it. my guess is as good as yours, but when I heard this story first-hand by the person who was there to witness all of this, it was as if the new conscious awareness of the deceased mother now in intangible form took over and met with the karma of her wicked daughter. I am skipping out on some details here, but this story was one for the books when I heard it a couple of weeks ago. and, I was not surprised…which brings me to my next point about the physical death of a person, and their effect upon us afterward.

when we leave tangible form (ego), we…see. I won’t go into soul or oversoul purpose and specifically what happens for the sake of keeping this post on topic, but I will say that any one of us who leaves our body is able to see all that ever was and is across time and space: truth. truth resonates in the higher dimensions, and those are the intangible dimensions. period. some of us, whilst still in human form, can access those dimensions. depending upon how much self-work we have done. aka how honest we can be with ourselves. not everyone wants to access truth, which is best reached beyond the confines of the human linear mind (ego). and so they struggle dearly.

part of this post is about bringing peace of mind to anyone who feels stressed, abandoned or dumbfounded by a sudden, not sudden, or otherwise death of a loved one, friend or acquaintance. part of my intention to express some peace for others is describing my experience and knowing with the unseen. if perhaps you connect to that, or can feel the resonance through my writing, well, maybe that is a start. another part of my intention to express some peace for others is to explain how truth hits the fan when people die. again, think of it like this: all of the control, lies, or otherwise disappointing human qualities in those around the person who dies will be revealed. almost immediately. for some of us, this can be a wonderful and healing event. for others of us, we see things that we never wanted to see, or were hoping were not true. either way, the veil is now gone. if you believe in truth rising, there can surely be peace around the death of a loved one as for better or worse, it can provide much closure on a variety of levels. finally, I want to share this…

I recently lost someone who I loved very much. we had a most special connection. we had a language in which to communicate, telepathically, for when she died. I never really knew for certain if this language would “show up” for me when she decided to go, but I was hopeful. before she died, she appeared in a series of dreams this year. I cried so hard DURING the dreams that I would awaken with salty dried tears all over my face. I couldn’t believe it: I was already mourning her! I felt like she was giving me the biggest gift already. she spoke to me directly in the dreams. she said goodbye. she also said goodbye while she was still alive. she made me aware of her terms of death and what she wanted for me. the circumstances surrounding her death were unfortunate, mostly due to the ego and control of those around her. but there is nothing that can ever, ever interfere with our connection. this is true for all relationships, whether they are friendships or family or otherwise — what is true, is true, and it transcends time and space and everything in it that is not true. as I mourned her in my dream states, I wondered when I would feel her leave. and then one day I just knew when she did. she showed up in my bedroom in a timeline of her youth. she was graceful, beautiful, and strong. her essence is something I remembered from years ago. it was not an essence of the present, but her consciousness was more present than ever.

at the time she left her physical body, the most incredible synchronicity happened for me. a terrible grip that someone had upon me energetically (namely connected to the theft of my domains and more) became unraveled. I discovered, in the most amazing way, the cause and location of exactly an issue I dealt with for over a year. it was as if she spelled out for me how to unblock this massive interference in my life, in a language that I did not even speak. I was shown “accidental” evidence and Freudian slips that I believe are a strong byproduct of her freeing up the physical space in the tangible realm that contained many lies and controlling behaviors. as soon as she transitioned, it was as if I was being helped in a way no one else could help me. not to mention the fact that although we were close, I felt and now feel closer to her than ever. I feel her support, friendship, and awareness of my truth more loudly than ever would have been possible while she was on this physical plane. it may sound weird to say, but we now have an opportunity for a closer relationship than ever. and I have a feeling that this is just the beginning.

sometimes and often when loved ones die, and we had a karmic agreement with them, it is easier for THEM to carry out their commitment to us AFTER they transcend their physical container. that is, if WE are able to connect to them from this realm to that realm. and what can we do? we can simply talk to them like they are right there. I know this may sound odd to anyone who has not experienced “other”. but I would suggest trying it. perhaps if anything I’ve said in the above examples resonates, the step can be made toward a connection between your dimension (physical) and that of whom you want to connect with (nonphysical). while it is safer for the mind to process such deep connections in a dream state, you may also notice with comfort that recently deceased loved ones will ramp up synchronicities and the truth to assist you in many ways. it is their way, also, of righting wrongs that occurred while they were in physical form and tied in with other physical beings who all have ego (our block to so much).

the physical death of a person, and their effect upon us afterward, can express itself in many different ways. the above ways are my experiences. if you had a difficult relationship with someone who then died, you may also find it easier to connect/forgive/”dialogue” with them while they are in intangible and subsequently ego-less form. if you want to. the message is that there is opportunity, even after physical closure with someone on this live human plane, to learn something new that you could not connect to on this plane because of aforementioned human roadblocks (ego). when there is no longer ego, aka a foggy lens, there can be even greater and deeper healing between you and your “loss” — regardless of how your closure took place on this plane. above all, be open to the truth, because their new plane of resonance has much to offer in the way of it that wouldn’t have been possible in our 3d reality.

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