a take on addiction you likely have not heard before. the blessing and curse spheric energy is alive and real. mostly the blessing part.
I see and treat a lot of people with addictions. not always substance or drug. gambling, eating, sex, and so on. whilst I have not experienced one of those addictions, I would say that my addiction was to knowing. to knowledge. to analytics. to FEELING BETTER through KNOWING. which I am surprised never manifested into a physical addiction. but for whatever reason it just didn’t. I joke and say that I was too broken to ever chase a high. BUT it doesn’t make me any different. or better. or evolved. or whatever. because I still fought a battle of PATTERNING – which is also the essence of addiction. so I can relate.
every time we pursue an addiction, we are seeking connection to source energy. if you haven’t noticed, we are more than physical matter. we are 3d, 4d, 5d and beyond. we get our technology from beyond. source energy is all that feeds life. it creates life. in it’s most pure state, it feels like ecstasy. it feels like unencumbered peace. orgasm. when we achieve this state through a third party activity or focus, and it encompasses us to the point where we fear never reaching that state again because it feels like breathing, we are addicted to the idea that we can not get there ON OUR OWN. and, since the natural process to reaching that path on our own would have to — for ANYBODY — be an actual spiritual awakening, that path is robbed (but also spawn!) by said substance or activity. and the labyrinth through which we inevitably have to meander without bartering with the universe becomes more foggy. it gets put on “hold” when we are in an addiction. but that labyrinth is, no matter what, the ONLY route. it is the honest route. the made route. the route with staying power of integrity. because we have done the worked and earned being there, unlike visiting via the shortcut. when our addiction creates a shortcut, the natural path is eclipsed. hidden. making our spiritual awakening that much harder than if the addiction was not in place. YET also magnifying the victory of the awakening. the pain is relevant to the imminent pleasure. it’s really all relevant. but for the purpose of this post I want to focus on the beauty and gifts that addiction can bring.
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we are not attacked because we are flawed; we are attacked because we are brilliant. learn about the physics behind human behavior.
do you receive a polarized response from the humans you encounter? if so, they are responding to your light – not the absence of it.
ever since I could remember, I was a target. a scapegoat. a whipping boy. (read the definition of whipping boy!). I knew no different and it carried on throughout my entire life. for years I carried the burden of believing that there was something inherently wrong or flawed with me. so, I settled. a lot. I settled in friendships, I settled in relationships, I settled in all aspects of my life. I never felt comfortable with my “peers” and was often outcasted. or very admired. but usually outcasted and betrayed and bullied even by those I befriended when no one else wanted to have anything to do with them. I always felt the outsider.
as the years went by, in my early 20s, I began to meet people who I did not feel the outsider with. now, this didn’t make a whole lot of sense to me. because “on paper”, I had nothing to offer them. the people I felt I didn’t have to do anything other than breathe around to be accepted happened to be super accomplished individuals. famous athletes, singers, public figures of all sorts. men, women, young and old. for some ODD reason (or so I thought), I could be in a crowd of 100,000 people and these people and I would make eye contact and talk. like we knew each other forever. this felt extremely odd to me. because, if I could not fit in with my “peers” and struggled my entire life to feel “normal”, why were these very over-the-top individuals so EASY to be around? I felt normal. accepted. uplifted by their energy. I battled understanding A) why I kept drawing these people in and B) was this simply my ego, excited to spend time with well known people C) why all insecurity went out the window when I was with them. there was a drastic difference in the way I felt physiologically around “these” folks versus the ones I was “supposed” to fit in with. now, it is not to say that the ONLY folks I felt “normal” around were of this public figure variety. not at all. but there was a common denominator amongst the ones I met and how at ease I felt, every single time. I began to journal about these experiences to understand what was happening. as I spent time with these folks, I understood that they, too, felt like pariahs their entire lives! some of them didn’t get as much “hate” as I seemed to get, and some of them had very supportive and “easy” family lives, but their soul existed in a longing-for-more state. no matter how many fans or public support they received, they still felt “different”. and there were holes in their hearts. nothing could make up for this feeling or take it away. what they were indeed experiencing was a massive variance between their energy/frequency point and that of the collective norm/others. that variance created the feeling of contrast, hence the perception of extreme separation. these people were what I later considered to be “outliers”…with that, like all things, came both blessings and curses.
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